Focus Change: From Weight to Health

I’ve almost been vegan for a year. Can you believe it? Time has gone by so quickly, and I don’t regret a second of it! So I thought I’d fill you in on my progress, and something that switched mentally along the way.

When I first went vegan, in the end of June/beginning of July 2015, I went through a week of major withdrawal; not from animal products, but from cheese! My husband ate nachos almost daily, and the smell of melted cheese would be ever so tempting. So how did I combat it? By having a piece of fruit in my hand and shoving it in my mouth… lol. You do what you have to do.

From there, it got easier. However, since I was so excited about this vegan world, I started looking for everything vegan in the grocery stores. I subscribed to a local Organic Box delivery which was the greatest thing because then I was able to select organic produce to be delivered weekly so that I always had fruit and veggies available. But as the fall came, things changed.

In the colder weather, I wanted cooked foods all the time. No problem, really. You can easily be a cooked food vegan. But, with a few complications in starting up my next school year, I started grabbing denser calorie, fast food. This meant hitting much too much of the shelves and freezers in the grocery stores. Not only was I excited that so many things were vegan, but I was able to try so many vegan products. Let’s just say, I was not paying attention to the macronutrient breakdown in any of them. My diet was very high in fat.

Now, I was already mentally transitioning from a person who had heavily counted calories, starved myself to lose weight, and pretty much obsessed with being thin to someone who was just concerned about being healthier for myself and doing what I felt God was calling me to do. That didn’t make it any easier when I found my weight still climbing. I was eating all that I cared for, reaching a state of being full but not being stuffed. I felt pretty well, but I knew the weight gain was not what I wanted. However, I continued on because it was easy to do.

Christmas came, and I was so excited to travel to the states to try some new vegan restaurants. They were AMAZING. But it hit me when my mother-in-law had to ask my husband if she should even bother asking me if I wanted to sort through some clothes of hers before she donated them. That told me right away everyone noticed my weight gain. I started to feel pretty bad.

The following two months presented me with some of the greatest stress I have had in quite awhile. My husband left for school in the states, I moved our entire apartment myself, making appointments to sell items along the way. As soon as things were finally moved, I had to prepare report cards. As soon as that was over, I had to prepare for parent-teacher interviews. Needless to say, I got really sick after that. I literally did not have a single break, and as happy as I was to be leaving our old place, I hit the point of nostalgia as it was emptied and I was doing it alone. Emotional ups and downs, zero rest, and not eating was a recipe for disaster, and a time to hit my highest weight. I knew things had to change.

I was not giving up veganism, that was not an issue. Veganism had made me feel better about pretty much everything. In fact, when I was not reminded about my weight gain, I actually felt amazing. But I knew I could do better.

With my husband in school, and I taking on all of our bills, the money was cinched tight. I had/have a very small budget which meant all those vegan junk foods were few and far between. I actually had to start cooking again! And you know what? I felt even better than before. I found out that my greatest eating pattern is eating raw throughout the day (mostly fruit) and eating a cooked meal in the evening. The cooked meal ranges from pasta to potatoes to veggies and vegan proteins, to vegan sushi, to cream of wheat, to sandwiches. They are not complicated at all, and are whole-food based. I feel vibrant and amazing and have even found a 6-day pattern of attending the gym again. And that’s when it happened: I started caring less about my weight gain.

I knew I was bigger than I wanted to be, but I chose to trust the system. People have been through this before; I’m not the only one. God’s original diet for us was the fruits of the earth, and I was closer than ever to following that diet. I began to pray for God to not only bless my food before I ate it, but to bless my efforts in trying to eat the way He designed for us, and for my results to show to others that this is His design as well. I began to pray before workouts for the same thing. And then I continued to eat when I was hungry and stop when I was full, except this time, it was whole plant foods from home.

You know what? In less than two months, I am down 14 pounds from my heaviest. Did I cut calories at all? No. In fact, I have been logging my food everyday just to see how much I’m eating. Some days, I’m not very hungry and I only eat around 1500 calories. I don’t like to go lower than this, so that does involve an some extra food I probably wouldn’t have otherwise eaten. Some days, I’m super hungry and can eat over 3000 calories. I’m not starving my body anymore. I’m giving it the healthy nutrition it needs, and it’s working.

I’ve always worked out which you’ll see if you have followed this blog for quite awhile, so that has not changed. I’m currently doing 3 full-body circuits a week with 3 cardio sessions between and 1 rest day. I’m getting stronger, and my endurance is better. I absolutely love it.

So I’m continuing on my vegan journey, in love with it greatly. My father has started his own fitness journey and to my surprise, displayed a picture of a blender with raw vegan protein powder. He’s been making banana/protein smoothies. It’s a huge step! My mother has been trying to cut down on the animal consumption within the house, and a coworker of mine has just begun her own vegan journey as well. More and more I’m realizing that people are waking up to the reality of how great a vegan diet is, for health reasons, beliefs, ethical and environmental reasons. It is truly the greatest. And though weight loss is awesome, it beats nothing to knowing your body is healthy and going to last you a little longer. When you eat healthy, the body releases the fat that is not good. It’s a slow process, and already within the two months, I’ve had over a week of being stalled on the exact same weight. But I continued nonetheless, and it paid off with a lower weight break in the end. So take courage. If I can do this, you can too. Start researching and be awakened to the world of truth that is out there. It’s truly amazing how deceiving the world is. Get to the nitty gritty and find out for yourself; the only regret you’ll have is that you didn’t do it sooner.

Judgment: I’m Guilty of It Too

I’m going to make this post a lot shorter than I originally  intended. Mainly because I’m not quite as heated up about it as I was at the time I wanted to write about it.

A student asked me this week if I would rather have 15 hour days or 34 hour days. I have no idea why those two numbers were picked, but I would definitely rather have the 34 hour days because then I would have more time to do things AND more time to sleep. I see it being a double win!

Anyways, I was part of another conversation on Facebook, a couple different ones I guess. And one thing I noticed is that people were very quick to judge who I was, especially if they didn’t agree with my opinion. I got called a hypocritical vegan, racist, a selfish person, etc. And that’s fine if it were true, and maybe somewhere in my actions, I don’t realize I am slightly those ways, but here is what the people didn’t know, and I called them out on this.

They didn’t know that I’m not a hypocritical vegan. I grew up eating meat. I was vegetarian for many, many years and only went back to eating meat because of getting into bodybuilding and fitness. I then became so miserable that I went to what I thought was only natural and the best for you – vegan. Since then, I’ve educated myself and now refuse to buy anything related to animal products. I research everything and to any of my knowledge do not buy animal-based products, even to the extent I refused to buy a new vehicle with leather in it! I only buy vegan make-up products, self-care products, and even now that my blowdryer just died after 11 years, I’m researching vegan blowdryers. Hypocritical? I really don’t think so…

Now racist and selfishness came in the same conversation with the ever trivial topic of the Syrian refugees. My point was to be careful with who we let in. I wasn’t saying to never let any Syrians in, I wasn’t saying to ban all Middle Eastern people, I was simply saying to be careful. It’s no different with any other race in any other country. I mean, there are WHITE people from North America that have joined ISIS. Am I going to say we should let them come back to our country just because they’re white? Absolutely not. My entire point was to be careful, to do the proper screening so that we can assess who really needs help from those that are actually terrorists that are trying to sneak in, because regardless of whether we like it or not, we live in a time where things like fake passports are easily available, some that are not even distinguishable from real ones. But back to what they didn’t know.

They didn’t know that in high school, I willingly gave up Christmas to go to Peru on a mission trip and give my time, my labour, and gifts to other people much more needy than myself. And no, my parents did not pay for that trip. They may have helped some, but most of that was fundraising and my own high school job that helped pay the thousands of dollars to go and give some more. They didn’t know that throughout high school and university, I spent extensive amounts of time gathering things for those less fortunate, and serving the homeless through things like soup kitchens and simply setting up tables in the middle of the homeless areas downtown for them to come get coats and other warm items to wear. What they didn’t know is that when I see people begging outside of grocery stores or gas stations in need of food or gas money or whatever, I stop and ask what it is that they need and pay for things for them. What they didn’t know was that in university, I was on a Choir trip to California, and the group of us (50+) were walking the streets of San Francisco where a homeless man was holding out a hat for money. Some rude boy walked by (not from our choir) and threw the money all over the ground. The homeless man was disabled and was having an extremely difficult time trying to reach the money. So regardless of how many countless people I saw walk by him, I stopped and picked up the money for him to which he was extremely grateful for and ended up handing me a Christian pamphlet. I will never forget that. What they don’t know is that even though I’ve become much too busy in my life to do as much as I want to help others, my heart aches when I see the disasters and injustices going on in this world. I cry about it. I pray about it. I cannot wait for God to return and wipe out all of the evil there is. Yes, things are not fair and I hate that it has to be that way.

But these are all the things these judgmental people didn’t know about me because they didn’t take a chance to know where I come from. Am I guilty of this sometimes? Absolutely. I will never profess to be perfect because sometimes you make judgement calls in the heat of the moment. But more and more I am consciously trying to take a step back, learn abut the person or situation, and then take a stand. Too often we are too quick to jump on something that we think is right without knowing the whole truth at all.

Take the time to be educated before jumping to conclusions.

And Next Up: My Sense of Smell

As crazy as it seemed that my tastebuds were “awakened”, I’ve also noticed another sense changing… Keep in mind, you body completely replaces its cells every so often, and I’m definitely sure that this is the case.

My sense of smell has change.

My husband was eating his typical key lime greek yogurt. I used to love that stuff! Rich, creamy, and just a peak of sweet sourness. But this time, while he was sitting beside me, I smelled this sour, awful smell. It wasn’t to the point I was gagging, but I did not like it at all! What has happened to me? I used to be the dairy queen (mainly cheese), but now I don’t even like the smell of it. Stinky cheese? They were never stinky to me before.

Things have definitely changed…

Dairy? No thank you!

Canada Vs. States: Why the Difference in Products?

As many of you know, my husband is from the states, and I’m from Canada. We are both currently living in Canada, and have been for several years. One of the biggest things my husband has noticed, besides how expensive many things are compared to the states, is how little selection we have compared to them! Why is that?

For those of you who are wondering what I’m talking about, take Oreos for example. It’s a simple example, but a good example. At my grocery store right now, we have the regular Oreos, Light Oreos (less fat), White Oreos, and Double-Stuff Oreos. At certain times, we had the privilege of having Birthday Cake Oreos and once we found S’mores Oreos, but they were both short-lived and not to be seen again.

I’ve seen videos of people in the grocery stores in the states, and the amount of flavours of Oreos available are immense! Why can’t we have that selection here in Canada?

Interesting tidbit: Oreos are vegan! Only eat as a treat as they are definitely not the most healthy option!

The Banana Problem

So, because I’ve turned vegan and have been researching a lot, I’ve learned that of course in order for bananas to be ripe, they should have lots of spots on them. The bright yellow bananas are actually still very starchy and haven’t had time for the starch to turn into sugar yet. So I’ve been trying to let the bananas sit longer. But I noticed that I don’t like the bananas as much. I couldn’t figure out what was going on!

I was watching Freelee’s videos (as usual) and I noticed when she would peel a banana, it would stay upright like a normal banana should. My very ripe bananas were almost falling over! Yet the peels looked the same… How are the outsides the same but the insides are so different? I was very frustrated. I couldn’t eat the banana as a banana and so was making multiple smoothies.

Today, since I’m coming off the two days I spent eating cooked meals and going back on RawTill4, I knew I needed to have more than the 13 oranges I freshly juiced this morning. That wasn’t enough. So I looked at my bananas, and picked fairly spotty ones, though not as spotted/almost brown looking as I had been leaving them to ripen, and let me tell you, I ate 13, as is, no smoothies. They were like banana sugar paradise! I have found the right stage for bananas to be! Now I understand what they are actually supposed to taste like! Yahoo!

So here’s what I figured out. Different climates will cause things to ripen in different ways. My fruit is not sitting in the sun, I live in a very dry climate (whereas she lives in a tropical climate), and so they almost certainly are not going to ripen the same way. Duh!

I am seriously so happy I figured it out. It actually saves on time for ripening, and I love them! Such sweet goodness! Have you ever had struggles with bananas? Did you know about the proper ripening of them? Leave your answers in the comments below!

Cooked Vs. Raw Experiment

So I’ve been watching a lot of videos, and I’ve heard from Freelee herself that RawTill4 is the most recommended, completely raw vegan is the most ideal, but eating cooked starches is a good third. I also watched a few videos of people who have stopped following Freelee as I was curious as to what they had to say.

For one, I found that the things they were complaining about were either things that were taken the wrong way from her videos, or they clearly didn’t watch all of her videos to understand as much as they should have. The other thing I noticed is they would break away into their own ideals which is fine. I’m not saying Freelee is a god, but I think her nutrition information is great. There is scientific back-up, real life testimonies, and basically everything that makes common sense. I don’t always agree with her views on everything, but there is no denying she is passionate about what she does, and that’s awesome.

So for a bit of an experiment, I decided to try having one meal of fruit in the morning, and then turning to cooked foods starting from my morning snack. I did it for two days, stuck with my normal vegan foods, just the cooked versions. Well, I can assure you I’m returning to RawTill4 tomorrow.

Here’s why:

Basically, I feel fatter, and I feel bloated, and it doesn’t go down as quick like it does with fruit. Cooked food requires more energy to digest and is less hydrating. I feel that. I go to the washroom much less frequently, and the hydration levels are lower. I feel the difference. I’m not hungry, I’m not starving, but I don’t feel as “fresh” either. I miss feeling lighter. I miss feeling “fresh”. So tomorrow, I’m going back.

If you ever experiment with this, let me know how it worked for you! Leave your story in the comments below.

Successes of Going Vegan (Approx. 2 Weeks Solid)

I’m so happy to report I’ve been consistent in sticking to my vegan lifestyle, and especially the RawTill4 principles. Since I’ve been solid with it, I thought I should share some of the amazing things I’ve experienced because of it.

Here are some things I’ve noticed:
1. My energy is much higher and lasts throughout the day.
2. My attitudes/emotions are so calm and patient (not that I wasn’t before, but even more so!).
3. Acne scarring honestly seems to be getting better, though improvements on the actual acne still need to happen.
4. When I eat tons of fruit, smoothies, and some extra water, I NEVER have to worry about becoming dehydrated. Remember: The way to tell is the colour of your pee! Clear is best!
5. Digestion, not a problem. I’m getting in so much fiber from the natural fruits and veggies. I grew up with bad digestion problems, so this is amazing!
6. My strength/endurance in the gym has not been affected negatively, but rather they have increased! Mind you, my consistency lately of getting to the gym has not been good, so that needs to be worked on too.
7. I’m not starving… ever! I eat as much fruit as I want, and as much vegan cooked foods (preferably more starches and veggies) in the evening. I’ve never been this satisfied before!
8. I never feel bad about what I eat. I can feel that it’s healthy. No more upset stomachs or anything. (As long as you combine food properly!)
9. My house smells like fruit. Not the going bad kind. No wasting food anymore around here!
10. I don’t have cravings. I really wondered about the cravings thing… but honestly, when you’re full of sweet fruit, you crave NOTHING. Even going to the movies, I don’t want any of the concession stuff. My husband has cookies and things in the house, and I don’t want any of it. I use to make cookie dough by the bowl just to eat it, but not a chance anymore. This is the hugest blessing… I can’t even begin to express what it’s like for food not to have that power over you!
11. I have the satisfaction of knowing I’m eating things I should be eating. I try to be as organic as possible, and the less chemicals, the less animal fat, animal stress, decomposing flesh, etc… is not going in my mouth! I’m getting first hand nutrients from the earth, and I’m not killing animals to try to get as many second-hand nutrients to satiate my body. There is a definite feel-good feeling with this!
12. Most restaurants have some sort of vegan offering or substitutions. I never have to feel left out when joining people for supper!

This lifestyle is awesome. Honestly, try it for a month and see the difference it makes for you! If you’re curious about what exactly I typically eat? Then check out my post entitled, “Now That I’ve Got It – A Typical Vegan Day“.

Why the Name “Christian” Can Cause Such Anger

I’ve delayed in writing this blog post. The past few days have been a whirlwind for me. Not because I’m cleaning up my classroom, preparing for a new grade, but because the world has changed ever so quickly, and I needed to make sure my own emotions were not mixing and leading my thoughts but that rather my beliefs were the driving force behind my words.

When I decided I wanted to turn vegan, I thought what better place to learn than to join vegan groups on Facebook where people are continuously discussing ways of doing things better and on improving lifestyles. What better place would you get a mix of people who are starting out in their vegan adventure, as well as though who are tried and true veterans to the lifestyle. I did enjoy these facts, but I wasn’t prepared for what was coming.

As many of you know (and if you didn’t, I don’t know how you could have missed it), but the states have just legalized same sex marriage. To some people it’s no surprise, to some people it’s a reason to lash out, and to some people it’s a reason to celebrate. I was prepared for those reactions. What I wasn’t prepared for was the anger backing people’s responses. And it took a few days for me to truly understand what was going on.

Unfortunately, one of my vegan groups posted about this legalization and stated that you will never find a “homophobe vegan”. A man simply stated (though not in words I would have used) that he was not a “phobe” by the meaning of the word “phobia” as in being scared. He simply was using Biblical pieces to back-up the point that he did not support the movement. The backlash he received was incredible. And as I noticed he was the only one defending his beliefs, I decided to try and approach the conversation in a loving but understanding way. You see, I’ve noticed people are very quick to criticize Christian beliefs as being old and not modern day. But I knew that this is often because Christians have made a bad name for themselves.

I once saw a conversation where Christians were attacking an atheist. I could see where her comments and attacks were coming from. I couldn’t stand Christians reacting in this kind of way so I entered the conversation as well and simply responded to her questions and comments in a loving, non-judgemental way. It took quite awhile, but believe it or not, she thanked me for talking to her the way I did and explaining things the way I had. Of course she assured me she wouldn’t become Christian anytime soon, but that wasn’t the point of my discussion. The basis of my discussion was love.

So I figured that maybe if love was presented the right way in this vegan conversation, then maybe the hatred I was seeing would dissipate and the group could go back to the original purpose of becoming vegan and standing for animal rights. However, I’m sad to say it did not work that way. No matter how many times I reassured that none of the Christians in the conversation weren’t hating them nor judging them (all 2 of us), they served critique after critique back. No matter how many times I assured them that Christians should be focused on loving and loving all people, hate was served back. No matter how much love I tried to show about loving people but not supporting decisions they make, I was not supported. I even told them that the God of the world, Himself, has given us the power to choose what we do, regardless if we choose sin or not, and thus everyone in the world should have the power to choose what they want without anybody telling them otherwise, I was still considered judgemental. I brought up how I have a great uncle who has been a married gay my whole life and how I love him dearly and will never treat him otherwise, but that I do not support his lifestyle, I was still considered a “homophobe”. I was called a jerk, ingenious, told to take a nap, told I have mental sickness, that somehow someone loved me but in the same sentence told me everything I am is a sin, that God was going to send me to hell to burn for eternity, etc. And I was reminded again and again how listening to a 2000 year old book is so wrong.

I was not prepared for the hardness of hearts I was presented with. This is why I did not write this blog when I first thought of it. In fact, it’s been sitting as a tab for the past however many days since the law was passed. I’ve changed the name 3 times. I needed time to sort through what was going on, and to make sure my emotions were in check. And now I think I’m ready to help explain where I think things have gone wrong.

There happens to be a girl many years younger than I who was feeling the same way I was – being attacked by so many people, being pushed with no rest, exhausted from having to defend herself. The message came clearly in her Facebook post and the response from someone questioning the selection of beliefs, specifically pertaining to the lack of support on the same sex marriage issue.

I really thought about it before I posted this time, and I provided a very prominent issue among different Christians about the “clean” and “unclean” foods. I stated it as the fact that many Christians don’t support eating pork. Some claim that because it is an Old Testament law, that we no longer have to follow that distinction. Although many Christians disagree on this issue, we don’t hate our own family members just because they eat differently than ourselves. The best way to influence anyone in a positive way is through a loving manner. I also added that I grew up as a hunter’s daughter. When I turned vegetarian, my grandfather was convinced I would die. In fact, for the almost 10 years I was vegetarian, the very first question he would ask me is if I was healthy and had gone back to eating meat yet. The amount he would try to sneak meat onto my plate was crazy. He did not support my eating habits whatsoever. But he never stopped loving me. In fact, I can’t recall a day in my life where I did not feel loved by my grandfather, and that’s the way it should be.

To go a little further than that, she said she was going to put it bluntly and ask how same sex relationships is one law we believe from the Old Testament, but there were a host of others such as wearing jewelry, having tattoos, and premarital sex were things most Christians don’t follow anymore, yet we can choose to not stand for the same sex marriage issue.

This is where it truly sank in. The reason I believe that most people are so angry with Christians and our beliefs is because we have compromised on so much! Seriously, look around at your churches. I know for a fact that people drink, do drugs, party, have non-marrital sex with people regardless of being married or not, have problems with pornography, steal, cheat people out of money, etc, etc… There are people in almost every church who are the kings and queens of gossip. Churches are seen as judgemental because they’ve become that way. What have we done to ourselves?

Now, I’m not saying that all churches or even all people are this way. I do believe we have the sweetest, loving Christians still on this earth, and unfortunately that’s something we desperately need more of. But when Christians in themselves are out in the world claiming to be Christian and yet are caught in such horrible acts, what else is the world to think of us? Can you really blame people for hosting anger when they grew up in a church but like my sister, left because people were judging the clothing she wore? Do you really think that made her feel at home rather than winning her over with love? Personally, I’m ashamed at some of the things we’ve done to people. We should be opening our doors and welcoming, not just greeting, but truly welcoming people into our midst with the goal of letting love take over. When Jesus saved the prostitute, or sat with the tax collectors, you don’t see Him attacking them. He loved them and that’s what created the difference. Why can’t we do the same?

Of course I’m not saying we should kick out all of the people who are having problems either. What better place to receive help with healing than a church family, as long as we are being just that – a loving and supportive family.

Now, I know my beliefs may differ from yours, and that’s ok. Like I said, I have no judgement. The Bible, unfortunately, is not the most easily understood book at times, and some is left to our interpretation though hopefully somewhat unfolded with divine help (always pray before reading the Bible!). So yes, topics like jewelry and tattoos are a little more difficult to defend for some. However, I know the Bible clearly points out that our bodies are the living temples for the Holy Spirit, and we are to take care of them to the best of our abilities. Putting needles unnecessarily into my body, causing a stain that God did not put there in the first place that is ridiculous to remove, and putting holes all over my body does not seem like preserving the “holy temple” as God stated it. To me, that is clear enough definition as to why those are not the best idea. Jewelry that does not require holes (such as necklaces, rings, and bracelets) are a little more in the grey area. However, if you look at history, you will see that only the rich, and those who placed themselves above others wore jewelry. So at the time, it made total sense that jewelry was a way to separate the classes of people, and as far as I’ve read in my Bible, God doesn’t view us that way, nor does He want us to develop an attitude of being better than others. So to me, that makes sense. When it comes to premarital sex, it’s a no-brainer to me. You don’t need a Bible to tell you it’s not the best idea. Look up science reports and the reactions in the brain with sex. Look up psychology reports. The more sex you have before marriage, the less you are bringing to your marriage. Imagine if everything was brand new coming into your marriage. No past relationships to discuss, no past comparisons to make, nothing bad to bring into your forever relationship. I think in a way, we’ve lost sight of how sacred and special marriage was supposed to be. It was a union, a joining of two people. And in Mark 10:9, it states clearly, “Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.” We say vows, vows that are actually supposed to mean something. God blessed the union between husband and wife and specifically said that NO MAN (that means nobody on this earth) should be able to separate that union. I don’t know about you, but there are an awful lot of divorces going on. A lot of “man” separating what God told us not to. And that’s in the New Testament, not even the old.

Again, I hope you are not taking offence to this. I am the product of a divorced family who married other divorced people. Divorce is around me, and although I love my family more dearly than anything, I will fight with all I have to preserve my marriage union because I believe that is what is right. (I may continue this conversation at another time. It’s a whole separate Bible study.)

So those are my thoughts. I’m not sure if Christians will ever recover. If we’re going to stand for our beliefs, we need to learn not to compromise. No, it’s not easy being criticized. If anything, becoming vegan has opened my eyes to a whole new way of being criticized (not enough protein, not losing weight fast enough, not going to be healthy, etc…). But if you truly believe in something and seek to receive the rewards at the end, then you need to stand for whatever it is. But remember to stand in a loving way. Hate is fuel to the fire, but love (usually) softens the hardest of hearts. So speak to and treat each other in love, regardless of what a person chooses, but stay strong to yourself and don’t compromise on the beliefs you hold. Nobody in this world has the right to force their beliefs on people. But rather, keep an open ear and seek to find the Truth, and once you have the Truth, hold on to it. As humans, we are master justifiers, master liars, and master convincers. Don’t let someone talk you out of being yourself and believing what you’ve sought to be true.

For another pastor’s perspective, I found this to be a good, well-written, loving read with Biblical back-up.
http://todaychristian.net/a-detailed-explanation-of-why-christians-dont-accept-gay-marriage/

Day 12 – An Unplanned Write-Off

This morning I woke up so dehydrated! So right away, knowing I caused damage last night, I drank some water.

But problems started right at breakfast. I actually tried to sit down and eat this red papaya I had. I noticed it smelled a little funny when I cut it open, but went on to eat it anyways. The very first bite, I spit out within two seconds. I don’t know what happened to this papaya, so of course I went looking for something else. I didn’t really feel like eating after the awfulness of last night, but of course, I want that stuff out of my house, then rationalized that I couldn’t waste all that money, so I finished last night’s leftovers. Awful, terrible, don’t even want to talk about it. The biggest key to success is to not even bring it in the house. I’ve gotta learn!

At the gym, I went for a gruelling 35 minute stationary bike ride. I kept raising the difficulty every two minutes and it took so much work. I was so happy when I was finally finished the last 10 minutes. I was beginning to think I should lower the level, but I managed to stick it out! I was so thirsty and drank a ton of water when I was done. But I was happy.

I finished my workout with some lunge stretches, walking high kicks, and my chiropractor’s exercises. It felt good to get things done in the morning for sure.

I don’t even want to speak about my lunch, but to be accountable, I must. Remember those brownies from last night? Well, let’s just say they got finished, topped with some vegan coconut milk yogurt. I should have just eaten the yogurt, but I can officially say all the junk is out of my house again. I just feel awful and need to get to the point of throwing stuff out rather than risking my health, and not ordering it in the first place. It’s back on the proper mental train.

Or… let’s just add fuel to the fire. My husband and I eventually got ready and headed into town. We’re due for our weekly groceries, and he had no food to really eat left. So we stopped to get him food. Instead of not getting anything like I should have, I did make a vegan decision, but a bad decision as far as eating when I wasn’t hungry. I had a green onion cake, and I would have been just fine if I hadn’t had it. Ugh… The moral of all of this is just stop. Just don’t indulge in things you KNOW are going to make you feel awful. It starts a huge train wreck that you have to try and reset yourself from. Learn from my terrible, bloating, sick-feeling, stomach-turning mistakes. I have not done my job in taking care of my body.

So, I’d like to say the rest of the day finally went better. To some minor extent, it did. But honestly, I snacked on Veggie Chips, organic limeade, and that’s about it. I was going to make baked bananas, but found out I had forgotten I was out of tin foil.

Today was a bad day, and a prime example of why the avoidance of eating junk is so important. Because I ate so badly all day, I had huge cravings for candy tonight. That’s a sure sign that I did not eat enough fruit today (or any) and it’s just a wreck. I’m thinking of doing a completely raw couple of days to help flush out my system. Let’s see if I have the mental power to do it!

Week 13 Day 1: Extended

So I did just what I said. I woke up bright and early, and got ready for the gym. I completed a harsh leg workout, but I ended up splitting the workout. I had only finished squats, hack squats and one-leg jumps before my husband woke up and wanted to come to the gym. So I finished up this round with 12 minutes of HIIT and went to get him.

We came back to the gym and I finished the remainder of my workout. For the first time ever, I enjoyed doing deadlifts. I felt strong and in control and I loved it! I almost cried doing 20 and 2s between prone leg curls and leg extensions. It really, really hurt. I also pushed super hard with leg press, using heavier weights again than usual. And as crazy as it was, I finished with my final and last 12 minute HIIT session. I’m completely done the challenge. All workouts and the equivalent for 4 cardio sessions a week completed. What a feeling!

I had taken some pictures two days ago of some ab outlines that I saw! I was ecstatic! And yet when I finished everything today, my pictures did not turn out the same way. I don’t know what I did! I was so depressed and almost ready to call the competition quits when I noticed someone had asked when the pictures were due, and our coach has given us an extra week to get pictures in! This was the hope I needed!

I’m going to monitor my diet very closely this week and try and get a picture to show the hard work I’ve done. I know my pictures won’t reflect the same fat loss I’ve seen from others, but I do want to be able to show what I’ve accomplished, and for whatever reason, my body does not reflect that today. So I’m going to take advantage of this week, and be watching for the opportune moment. It’s going to happen!

For the rest of the day, we didn’t get to the mall to shop for Christmas like we wanted, but we did go to a Mexican restaurant that we haven’t been to in a long time (I didn’t eat very much) and then we spent some time at Chapters. We absolutely love books and I was able to purchase my new agenda (what I used to write down my workouts) for the new year. It was a good night, and a day filled with hope. My husband is more or less in charge of my food and workouts this week, so let’s see how these pictures will turn out! The best part is, I don’t care if I win. It would be nice, but it’s ok if I don’t. I just want to see that hard work show!