From Feeling “Trapped” to Feeling “Free”

My husband and I (and our pups) just spent the last two days driving back up to Canada from the states. The past two weeks in the states have been phenomenal to say the least. I’ll write a post stating more of what we did later, but I experienced something tonight that I needed to feel, something I didn’t know would be possible for a very long time.

In high school, I lived in the “big city”. It was nice for the duration I was here, but when I left, I swore never to move back. I am a small town girl, and the big city is just not my scene.

When I graduated from university, I was able to get a job for the first year in a small town. Bingo! But when that maternity leave position ran up, so did my other plans.

I received a phone call from my superintendent that I had an interview scheduled in the “big city” on such-and-such a date at such-and-such a time. I hadn’t even been asked, I had simply just been told.

On that day, I drove to the city, did my interview, and of course, got the job. I couldn’t believe what was happening. The one place I never wanted to end up was the one place I was being told I had to be. I was angry for a very long time.

Eventually, I got to the point where I simply went around saying “God certainly has a sense of humour!” But my one year employment turned into two, then three, and currently on year four.

Reflecting on it, I knew God wanted me to be here. There were certain situations I had to encounter as a teacher to grow. There were painful moments I had to experience to become wiser. There were children who needed someone to advocate for them, and there were relationships built with students who just needed someone to listen that wouldn’t judge them. I was able to fill that place. As much as they think they have learned from me, I learned ever so much from them.

This year, when my big change from 6th grade to 2nd grade came, I couldn’t believe it was happening. As much as 6th graders stressed me out, I loved the counselling aspect; I loved the difficult questions. I felt like a stranger in grade 2. But of course, as time went on, it became easier and I was able to find aspects I liked. But I couldn’t help thinking, is this really where I’m supposed to be? Is this really what I’m still supposed to do?

I can’t really say it’s teacher’s burnout (though I’m sure some things are similar). It’s just the feeling of being “stuck”. No matter how many ways I looked at our situation financially, I could see no better opportunity to survive than where we were. We both hate living in the city, though I’ve come to see good parts about it and don’t hate it as bad as I used to. But when I can hear parts of my neighbour’s conversations, when my neighbours that I strive to be so nice to turn around and stab me in the back, and when I no longer see a way that Canadians are nicer than Americans anymore (sad reality from what I see here in the city), I know we aren’t really happy here. It’s not where either one of us want to be. So that’s when I realized something this weekend.

When we were finally finishing our drive, doing the same maneuvers through the city as we had done for years, we had come to the house, walked in, and I suddenly felt like I was in someone else’s house. I felt like a stranger walking into someone else’s life. It was a strange feeling. My husband did not experience the same thing, but for some reason, it was like I was that “spirit” looking at someone else’s world, an outsider looking in. Of course that feeling is over now, but that wasn’t the only feeling that came.

After driving for 2 days, we absolutely did not have the energy to go grocery shopping. So we went out for supper (our fridge is bare). On the way home from supper, it hit me. This city is no longer my jail. I no longer feel like I strapped to this city, unable to move. I no longer feel like the city is the pit that is going to swallow me whole to keep me here with no escape. I suddenly realized, with options my husband, my mother-in-law, and myself had talked about after Christmas break, the world is at our fingertips. It may not be a fun ride to make change, but to get out of the rut of tiredness, depression, and feeling “stuck”, a few months of painful change would be so worth it. It’s no longer an impossibly large, looming, unattainable vision, it is now a totally possible, difficult but doable task. And taking those chains off was the best feeling I could have ever experienced.

I know this post is kind of vague, but this year is a huge year of change. I cannot leak more information than is timely, but I can assure you this year is going to difficult but good. Stay tuned!

Adventist Health Wake-Up Call

Something to think about in the new year:

I took a few minutes this morning to peruse the December 2015 Adventist World and the January 2016 Outlook (Adventist Publication from Mid-America). Between the two publications, there were 3 articles expressing the same topic, the topic of health.

Adventists are KNOWN for their health message. Ellen White expresses the importance of taking care of our bodies to truly do what we are meant to do for Christ. She expresses the best benefits being from a plant-based diet, but how many of us actually follow that advice?

Since I’ve embarked on my own vegan journey, I’ve watched so many documentaries and so many times Loma Linda is listed – the Adventists are listed – for living longer than any other North American groups because of our vegetarian/vegan diets. If the rest of the world is noticing, then why aren’t we following our own message?

We are so quick to apologize for the many sins we accept: lying, envy, stealing, even having bad thoughts towards another. These sins are obvious. But is it not also a sin to avoid taking care of our own health?

Think back to the Garden of Eden, to God’s OPTIMAL design for us. We all know animals weren’t killed then. Everyone lived in harmony, both human and animals alike. We didn’t eat all of this junk food that we have now. We didn’t eat animal flesh. We didn’t eat eggs or drink milk. We had the beautiful fruit from the earth. That was the diet God intended.

Now, the world has continued to become degraded. Our soil quality is not what it used to be. You do need to eat vegetables, fruit, grains and legumes. But the key is, you can still get all the nutrients, even often better received by your body, with an animal-less diet. God hasn’t left us hanging. His diet is still here.

In fact, cultures and groups who eat minimal to no animal products suffer less disease and illness. Why do we put our bodies through this?

As a child, I thought all of these things were ok. But the more research I do, the more I realize how blind we are. The even scarier part is that we refuse to be truthful with ourselves. We don’t consider the fact that the devil can easily use food to get us. Think of all the junk food society craves. Have you ever wondered why the ingredients list is always 10+ items long? Most of them you don’t even know what they are. The food industry wants to get you “hooked” and they know what ingredients to use to do it. We are a society with a “health message” where the majority ignore the truth.

We all know the phrase we long to hear when Jesus returns, “Well done good and faithful servant”. But how many of us can He say that to when it comes to His very temples? These bodies are not ours and we must treat them as such. These bodies are God’s. We invite the Holy Spirit to live within us, and yet we treat His house like garbage.

I’m an avid exerciser, and no it’s not always fun. There are days I drag myself to the gym. But without exercise, my heart would not function like it should, my body would not carry me around like it should, and my health would not be in continuous progress like it is.

I also was a cheese addict. I went vegetarian cold-turkey when I was influenced by my first vegetarians. I remained that way for years, often considering going vegan, but never actually having the willpower to say no to cheese. If I could double cheese on anything and everything, you can bet that I did.

When I decided to go vegan, I went through cheese withdrawal for about a week. Who could have ever thought you could go through cheese withdrawal? But it happens because of the design of cheese. It is meant to be addictive. At times during that week, I had to make sure I had fruit in my hand to shove in my mouth so that I wouldn’t be tempted to eat the cheese. And now? I would never look back.

So where does this leave our society? In my opinion, uneducated. It doesn’t take an Adventist to see the benefits of plant-based diets. The science is spreading through the world like wildfire. Evidence is springing up with the results in peoples’ lives. Several doctors are realizing their lack of nutritional education and are starting to get involved. It’s time for us to learn it for ourselves, to understand the impact we are having on ourselves and others. Can you imagine rarely getting sick? Rarely having headaches? Rarely having to go to a doctor? It’s possible, you just need to want to embark on the journey that is not going to be fun at first.

We also need to remember that everything we do in life – EVERYTHING – is seen by our LORD. He knows our motives, He knows our hearts. Just as it’s not always easy to walk up to someone to share the message of Christ with them (especially if you’re expecting backlash), it’s not easy to want to change your habits. But as we see throughout the Bible and throughout the world still today, God’s call is not an easy one. God doesn’t even bring you to paths you can handle. Instead, He wants your heart to be earnest, and then to walk with Him on the path He wants you to take, even carrying you part of the way when necessary.

This is not meant to be a controversial topic. It is meant to be a reminder of truth, of a journey that I have been on myself lately. I’m not perfect either. Even though I was able to hear the call to better health, to realizing and beating my addiction to cheese, I need to get better at a whole food diet and ditch the convenient, pre-made vegan food that I have made a habit of eating.

Life is a journey and it’s never easy. If it was so easy to be healthy, everybody would be healthy. It takes determination, acceptance of what needs to be changed, and the willpower to do it. And even so, all of our efforts without Christ on our journey with us are of little use. Christ is the extra motivation that we need. Picture this: You know Jesus is coming to your house today. What would you do? I know I would be cleaning like mad, making sure it looked the best it could, and preparing the best food I absolutely could. Our bodies are no different. We invite the Holy Spirit in, but how many of us have cleaned internally? Are you feeding your body the best foods so it runs the healthiest and is the cleanest it can be? That is a question for serious thought.

I’m going to leave you with some quotes from Ellen White and the author of the article, “Adventists Urged to Examine Their Meals,” Andrew McChesney:

“We have had this information for more than 120 years, ” said Dr. Peter N. Landless, director of the Adventist world church’s Health Ministries Department. “Sadly, many have chosen not to follow the advice that has been given to God’s inspired servant, but it is always reassuring when one sees that that which is given by inspiration proven by peer-reviewed, evidence-based science.”

He added: “Our prayer is that our church will take note, not because this is an issue related to salvation, but because it affects the quality of life and our service to a broken world, the mission to which we have been called.”

“Flesh was never the best food; but its use is now doubly objectionable, since disease in animals is so rapidly increasing,” White wrote in the book Child Guidance. [You would be surprised how much diseased flesh is in your animal products today, since she said this so many years ago! Our world is corrupt and hides many things from us.]

White, who Adventists believe had the gift of prophecy, wrote in the same book that meat would become more contaminated as the earth neared its last days and that Adventists would stop eating it. “Flesh will cease to form a part of their diet,” she said. “We should ever keep this end in view and endeavour to work steadily toward it. I cannot think that in the practice of flesh eating we are in harmony with the light which God has been pleased to give us.”

I wish you all a happy, healthy 2016 as we prepare for the ever-closer coming of our LORD and Saviour. May we leave ourselves behind and put God first, no matter what journey He asks us to embark on. Because unlike many things in life, we know the end. We know that all the evil of the world will fade away, and Christ will reign in the best lives we can’t even possibly imagine. All of our unanswered questions will be answered, and we will no longer have to watch suffering take place. Our LORD will be with us, face-to-face, with the loving embrace that will bring happy tears knowing that everything we’ve suffered, everything we’ve endured, everything we’ve experienced will have all been worth it. I cannot wait to thank Him for all that He has brought me through, and for all that He has done for me. What a glorious day that will be!

I Wonder If I Argue Too Much…

Sometimes I take a minute to sit back and reflect over what I do, whether it’s the direction my life is going in, or the way I handled a situation.

Recently, I’ve started thinking about my part in online discussions or arguments. In the past, I was the child who never spoke out. It was so bad, I would even have my younger sister go to the counter of a restaurant to get something they forgot to give me (even something as small as ketchup!).

When I first became (seriously) Christian, it was the same way. I was too scared that I didn’t know enough to speak out, or that I would be ridiculed because of information I didn’t have the answer to.

When I became vegan, it was the same thing. I didn’t feel I knew enough to speak out because I wasn’t the most “educated” or didn’t know “all the right answers”.

But as I continued to watch everyone else, I realized that you will never know everything. And besides, the best argument you have is your personal testimony, no matter whether it’s veganism, Christianity, or anything else. Nobody can argue what you’ve experienced. They can only argue facts and somehow even opinions (though I think everyone should be allowed an opinion).

The very first argument I ever felt brave enough to enter was between an atheist and a Christian. I couldn’t stand the picture of Christianity that the Christians were displaying that I felt compelled to go in and clear up the awful view. No, I was not trying to convert the atheist, I simply was explaining things she clearly had questions about and had been given a bad taste and picture of previously. By the end of the hour+ long conversation, she actually thanked me, and though she said she would not be considering becoming Christian at the time, she thanked me for being so understanding and being patient with my answers while explaining things in a different light than she had previously been shown.

To me, that should be the point of an argument or discussion. It shouldn’t be to fight or to prove one side better than the other. Of course I believe Christianity is the way, but I’m not going to force it down other peoples’ throats. God gave me my freedom of choice, so who am I to take it away from others? I can only present information and leave it up to them.

The next argument I ever went in on was not the same way. In fact, I got told to go take a nap along with being called many names. My whole point in that argument was that you can love people without supporting their actions. For example, you can love your child without supporting their drug use. You can support them for the good things, show them outwardly love, and even include them in normal things. But when an action they are doing goes against your beliefs or causes harm to either them or others, you don’t have to support that action. In no way does that mean you stop loving that person. But the group, or at least some people in that group, couldn’t accept that. I don’t know if I didn’t explain myself well enough, but I was in that conversation for several hours. It came to the point that I understood Christians were not going to be supported in that vegan group, and I respectfully excused myself from the group.

I don’t intervene in everything I see on the internet that I disagree with, but when it comes to things that harm others, when it comes to peoples’ health, or when it comes to slandering Christians, I try to go in and paint a different picture. Some people are accepting, some people will never be kind no matter what you say. I’ve been called a heap of names and been criticized against sometimes it seems like anything I say. Even when I’m remaining as polite as I can and stating again and again that nobody has to believe the same as I do, and that I will respect what they believe just as I would expect them to respect what I believe. It is possible to live in harmony without believing the same things (just look at the conversation with the atheist and I). But for some reason, I’m finding more and more people who cannot leave it that way.

I had a fellow Christian follow one of these conversations and eventually tell me that I should just end my conversation because the others (the main of which was apparently Hindu) was just going to keep coming up with every slandering thing and continue saying the worst possible portraits of Christianity they could. I just found it so sad. Sad that first of all, someone had views like that of what can be the most amazing faith. I know a lot of Christians call themselves Christian while living a very different life. Sad that also, someone who was a self-proclaimed “vegan” that is supposed to be filled with so much love could be so hateful towards Christians who honestly had done nothing wrong in this conversation but speak of the original diet in the Garden of Eden (vegan diet!). But as the other Christian woman suggested, I quit responding, despite the fact I continued to get blamed for things and called names in further comments.

I think about that conversation, and I continue to think of how I could have done it differently, what I might have done wrong. But the thing is, in every comment, I approached it in a very much “my experience was…” manner. I didn’t say that her beliefs were wrong, and I never discriminated against her, even telling her that I would continue to respect her and her choices. I don’t really want to continue the conversation, and I won’t, even though it’s hard to know that my name has been continued on in the conversation very negatively. I just don’t get it.

It makes me think… is there a point to me joining in these conversations? Is there a point when I’m just going to be downgraded and slandered by so many people? But then I also think of the vegan community who promotes standing up for those who are voiceless. I do think if you’re passionate about something, you shouldn’t just remain quiet about it, whether through actions or words. So do I just hold back my passion now that I finally feel brave to stand up for people? I mean, Christians in some of these groups literally get POUNDED into the ground by others, called every name in the book, their faith literally ridiculed up and down. I guess I feel like just by saying something (though again, not in a forceful way, often in a soft, from experience type of way) that they at least know someone is in their corner with them. I’m not afraid of being Christian. I’m not afraid of being vegan. I’m not ashamed of the things I believe. So if I get called names, it really doesn’t bother me. I don’t get as “heated” about these things as clearly others do. Temper control is not an issue for me in these conversations and part of me wonders if that’s what makes some people so mad. I don’t swear, I don’t believe in calling people names, I’m not that kind of person.

I don’t know… is it worth it or is it not? I guess I have just come to a place in my life where I’m content… maybe even more than content. For non-Christians, I know they won’t understand this, but for Christians who have experienced God saving their lives, they will know what I’m talking about. I can honestly say I’m filled with the joy of the LORD which makes everything surmountable. Months when we have less income, I don’t freak out anymore, because when I had no idea how we were going to survive before, God provided the money. I’ve totalled 2 cars, one that I in no way should have walked away from, but God protected me. I used to be so scared to face my mistakes and of punishments I may receive, but through God I know I have the strength to face whatever comes my way. I use to be so OCD about making sure everything was a certain way, but now I’m ok if things change. Even at work, when a wrench gets thrown in my plans, I don’t care. I’ve learned that nothing can be set in stone, but whatever may happen, God always provides. There is honestly little that upsets me. And why wouldn’t I want others to know that same feeling? Can you imagine a world where there was no stress, no worry, no panic? Can you imagine how much happier everyone would be? Can you imagine the amount of stress-induced illnesses that could be prevented? How can people not want a life like that?

Again, I’m not trying to force my lifestyle and faith down peoples’ throats. I always approach it in a way that I can share my experience and they can make their own choices past that. If that’s so wrong, then I don’t know how any conversation can take place. So I don’t know… what do you guys think? Is it worth the interjection in hopes that two fighting groups can maybe be a little more understanding and live in harmony? Or is it just a waste of energy? Maybe I try to play the “peacemaker” a little too much… I don’t know. Tell me what you think in the comments below.

Ben Carson Under Fire?

I have heard from many different places that Ben Carson is under fire for the way he treated the press in a recent press conference. I don’t think Ben Carson is completely flawless – no human is! But this got my interests peaked because as many of you may or may not know, he’s quite the guy with quite the story! I really encourage that if you don’t know his background, look it up! This guy is pretty amazing, and the best part is, he’s kept God in the forefront of his life.

Anyways, the first thing I did was to look at different articles to see the opinions voiced. This is when I learned about what the press was upset about.

Years ago, when Carson was looking at going to universities, he was offered to attend a reputable military school. Whatever the wording was, he was told it would be free. Carson took this to mean a full scholarship. He told the military officer that he would decline as that was not the route in life he intended to go. Thus, he applied and went to medical school and the rest is history.

The press says that Carson claimed he had the full scholarship to a place that apparently doesn’t even offer scholarships. Now, that’s fine. The military officer may not have used the word “scholarship” so yes, maybe Carson did not quite understand the meaning at the time. He worked very hard to pay for everything he had in life, so going to school for free because of good grades would quite obviously appear to be a free scholarship to him. I can see that. But call it a lie if you’d like. I guess it depends on how you see the situation. But then there was an argument that he never even applied to this military school. Well of course he didn’t. He never once said he did. In fact, he said he had $10 in his pocket. Applying to schools at that time required a $10 fee meaning he could only apply to one – his medical school.

So of course, this completely disqualifies the arguments I’ve seen in the articles. But I didn’t stop there – I went on to see Carson’s behaviour at said “press conference”.

At this press conference, the press kept asking him about these same questions, the same ridiculous, disqualified questions. As anyone would, he got frustrated that they were going over the same things again and again. He then threw the ball back in their court and asked why they didn’t dig into deeper issues with the current president and other candidates, one being Obama’s sealed school records that nobody can look at. Carson questioned why the press didn’t want to know what was on those school records and why they were being hidden. Honestly, that’s a good point. Carson’s story is out there, his memoir is there, and the questions they’re asking are already answered if they look at the whole picture. Why don’t they want to know things that are completely hidden for some reason? Doesn’t that make you question things?

Anyways, I find this whole situation completely blown way out of proportion. What do you guys think? Did I miss something? Is it as ridiculous as it appears to me? I honestly think they’re just digging for anything against Carson, even the most trivial of things, because if this was the worst thing he’s done, are we even looking at other politicians? It blows my mind. Leave your thoughts in the comments below!

I Prayed for 10 Years, and God Answered

Sometimes in life, there are things we don’t know how to approach. There are people we want to say things to to, but for some reason can’t find the right words. Sometimes, they can be missed opportunities that are missed out of fear. Sometimes, they are missed because we keep waiting for something or someone else to bring up the topic so that we have an opportunity to put in our heartfelt words that we need to say. Some people unfortunately underestimate the amount of time that is available for some things to be said.

For years I have been trying to get enough courage or find the right moment to talk to my father about God; about my views on God and trying to find out exactly where he’s at. My father believes in God, absolutely. But after learning about how awesome it is to be a child of God, that you can openly talk to God as a friend and call him Father, Papa, or even Daddy if you’d like, it left me in a state of uneasiness seeing my dad only ever refer to Him as things like “The Man Upstairs”. I didn’t get a sense of owning God, of realizing that God loved Him. But how do I bring up such a sensitive topic with my own father? I know, I know. Some of you would say that I should love my father enough to bring it up regardless, but just pause for a moment. This is my father. I care about him more than the average person I would meet and talk about God with. I don’t want to mess it up. I don’t want him to ask questions I don’t know the answer to. If I want to talk about it, I want to do it right, and there were not enough rehearsals to ever make me feel prepared.

But God changed that this summer.

Now, I think part of the reason is I had to tell my family I had turned vegan. They were used to me being vegetarian before, so in reality, vegan wasn’t much more of a step. They took the news a lot better this time than they did originally when I turned vegetarian, so I’m assuming I had them “warmed-up” for the big change.

Because I had to tell my family I was vegan, Dad asked me why I made the switch this time. I loved this question! I had the opportunity to tell my dad about the health benefits of being vegan and how much better it is. I didn’t go into incredible details of the effects on animals because my dad wasn’t there yet. But what did surprise me was one of the responses he did give me, which was simply this: “I could probably live without meat. But I guess my thing is I don’t want to. I love my steak.”

Now I know, there are definitely some people in the vegan community who would start criticizing my dad right away. I have heard and seen all the criticisms that could be used against his statement. But just hold on a second, after all, I know my dad better than you.

His statement was honest. He didn’t lie about it, he didn’t make excuses, he told the truth. He even admitted (for the first time ever) that he could probably live without meat! How big of a reality is that! This, coming from a man who literally grew up on the vegetables his mother grew in the garden, and the meat his father hunted in the woods. Even to this day, the family gets together to share moose meat if someone wins their moose license. It’s a way for them to save money and stock up the food supplies for the winter. Remember, New Brunswick’s economy is not huge by any means. And, if you think of it that way, he didn’t even go off listing a whole bunch of meats he couldn’t live without, he said one – steak. Now, I don’t support the killing of animals, I really don’t. But if he could even stop eating all other meats and only have steak once in awhile, that still saves lives! There is room for progress! So anyways, you can feel my excitement and hopefully understand it over that reply.

So I don’t know if it was because he was already asking me why I eat the way I eat or what, but he then asked me a question I have been waiting YEARS to answer, and that was about my faith. Now he didn’t ask an open-ended question such as what I believe, but he kind of asked in a weird way how my beliefs were compared to Catholicism. Now I can’t claim that he was questioning Catholicism, but I can say that he NEVER would have asked me this before. In fact, when I was baptized Seventh-day Adventist, my grandparents (his parents) told me I was playing with religions and that you should stick to the one you were born into. They are very set in following traditions which is also what the Catholic church holds onto, so I always saw my father having the same mindset.

Regardless, he opened up.

I asked him to clarify a little, and he basically asked if my beliefs had Saints like the Catholic church does, or if we pray to Mary, or those kinds of things. Now, imagine my heart bursting wide open at this point. Again, he may not be questioning things about the Catholic church that I don’t believe in, but it almost sounds like he is! So I just say no, and explain that everything we believe comes straight out of the Bible, and that we did have a “prophet” within the last century who passed all the tests as provided by the Bible as to how to recognize a true prophet or not, and though we don’t worship her or praise her, we do use her inspired teachings/writings as a deeper way to understand some of the confusing things in the Bible. After all, the Bible was written by God-inspired people. So it does make sense that somebody could have been chosen to be inspired by God again, which is why they conducted the Bible’s prophet tests on her to make sure she was truly being led by God. And I continued to explain to him that of course the Bible comes first, that we always pray to God, and that we do also believe in the Trinity: God (Father), Jesus (Son), and the Holy Spirit. But I told him (to emphasize the point) that everything we (or at least I) try to believe has to be based in the Bible, as tricky as that can be sometimes.

I’m not sure how my dad took all of that. It definitely wasn’t everything I wanted to say, but it was enough for the situation we were in. I wish I could say my dad said we’d continue the conversation later, but he didn’t. Mind you, we were in a busy situation, but I’m holding onto the fact that I’m praying God used that moment to plant seeds in my dad’s heart and mind. I’m praying that my dad will realize the greater relationship he could have with God than I think he does. I want that so bad for my dad, but as many of us know, if you push things, the person will usually retract. So for now, I’m being thankful God gave me that opportunity after so many years and will continue to pray that maybe Dad will ask me about things again so I can dive a little more into the personal relationship side of things. I’m still in awe that God did this for me, even though it has taken 10 or so years. God does answer prayer, that’s a fact.

So to end on a little extra happy note, my step mother and I have never talked about religion. I don’t really know her religious background… it’s just not usually a subject that is brought up. But even when I was driving around with her doing errands, she brought it up. And our conversation focussed more on whether the school I taught at accepted students of all walks of life, or if they could only be of our religion. We talked about how students from all walks of life do come to my school, but we don’t bend our beliefs based on theirs because they are choosing to pay and come to our school for some reason. She was curious how I taught my Bible classes, and I told her that I do respect the feelings and beliefs of all of my students, but that I’m not going to tell them to be sheep. I don’t just want them to believe things because I tell them to, because at one point, we all question what we believe. I want them to know why they believe what they believe with evidence, straight out of the Bible in black and white. I also told her that if they end up asking me a question about something I don’t know, I don’t ignore it. I either search out the answer myself, or we study it together as a class.

For example, this year my students were not into studying the life of Christ, something they’ve more or less covered since attending church as infants, but they wanted to know about the end times, about the dragon of Revelation, about what to expect. So you know what I did? Tossed my plans, and we started studying Revelation together. It was the most rewarding decision I could have made. Yes, there is some scary stuff in that book, but my students came from that book knowing so much better what to expect, what is going on in our lives, and how God is fighting for them every step of the way, wanting to protect them from every evil that is here and will come. They knew that things might get difficult for them, but that they shouldn’t fear as long as they put God first because ultimately, God is victorious and he is holding them in His hands the whole time.

I mentioned this in another blog, but it still blows my mind that two of my students who do not attend a church and do not come from religious families wrote to me at the end of the study, one saying that he had listened more than he ever thought he would, taking notes more than he ever had before, and the other saying how he’s not baptized (with a sad face) but knowing that he can do anything through the power of Christ and knowing that he can have a personal relationship with God was such good news to him. I mean, how much more powerful does it get than that! The students had questions, and God provided me the opportunity to learn and study with them. What an awesome way to be used by God!

So anyways, I guess if I can sum this up I would say, don’t be impatient. God’s timing is so much better than ours could ever be. And don’t give up. I mean, 10 years was a long time to wait for my opportunity to talk with my dad, but it came from his curiosity and not me preaching at him – 10 years, and God answered my prayer. So know that God does answer prayers. It may not be in the time you want, it may not be quite the answer you want, but God is always listening, and He will answer you.

Why the Name “Christian” Can Cause Such Anger

I’ve delayed in writing this blog post. The past few days have been a whirlwind for me. Not because I’m cleaning up my classroom, preparing for a new grade, but because the world has changed ever so quickly, and I needed to make sure my own emotions were not mixing and leading my thoughts but that rather my beliefs were the driving force behind my words.

When I decided I wanted to turn vegan, I thought what better place to learn than to join vegan groups on Facebook where people are continuously discussing ways of doing things better and on improving lifestyles. What better place would you get a mix of people who are starting out in their vegan adventure, as well as though who are tried and true veterans to the lifestyle. I did enjoy these facts, but I wasn’t prepared for what was coming.

As many of you know (and if you didn’t, I don’t know how you could have missed it), but the states have just legalized same sex marriage. To some people it’s no surprise, to some people it’s a reason to lash out, and to some people it’s a reason to celebrate. I was prepared for those reactions. What I wasn’t prepared for was the anger backing people’s responses. And it took a few days for me to truly understand what was going on.

Unfortunately, one of my vegan groups posted about this legalization and stated that you will never find a “homophobe vegan”. A man simply stated (though not in words I would have used) that he was not a “phobe” by the meaning of the word “phobia” as in being scared. He simply was using Biblical pieces to back-up the point that he did not support the movement. The backlash he received was incredible. And as I noticed he was the only one defending his beliefs, I decided to try and approach the conversation in a loving but understanding way. You see, I’ve noticed people are very quick to criticize Christian beliefs as being old and not modern day. But I knew that this is often because Christians have made a bad name for themselves.

I once saw a conversation where Christians were attacking an atheist. I could see where her comments and attacks were coming from. I couldn’t stand Christians reacting in this kind of way so I entered the conversation as well and simply responded to her questions and comments in a loving, non-judgemental way. It took quite awhile, but believe it or not, she thanked me for talking to her the way I did and explaining things the way I had. Of course she assured me she wouldn’t become Christian anytime soon, but that wasn’t the point of my discussion. The basis of my discussion was love.

So I figured that maybe if love was presented the right way in this vegan conversation, then maybe the hatred I was seeing would dissipate and the group could go back to the original purpose of becoming vegan and standing for animal rights. However, I’m sad to say it did not work that way. No matter how many times I reassured that none of the Christians in the conversation weren’t hating them nor judging them (all 2 of us), they served critique after critique back. No matter how many times I assured them that Christians should be focused on loving and loving all people, hate was served back. No matter how much love I tried to show about loving people but not supporting decisions they make, I was not supported. I even told them that the God of the world, Himself, has given us the power to choose what we do, regardless if we choose sin or not, and thus everyone in the world should have the power to choose what they want without anybody telling them otherwise, I was still considered judgemental. I brought up how I have a great uncle who has been a married gay my whole life and how I love him dearly and will never treat him otherwise, but that I do not support his lifestyle, I was still considered a “homophobe”. I was called a jerk, ingenious, told to take a nap, told I have mental sickness, that somehow someone loved me but in the same sentence told me everything I am is a sin, that God was going to send me to hell to burn for eternity, etc. And I was reminded again and again how listening to a 2000 year old book is so wrong.

I was not prepared for the hardness of hearts I was presented with. This is why I did not write this blog when I first thought of it. In fact, it’s been sitting as a tab for the past however many days since the law was passed. I’ve changed the name 3 times. I needed time to sort through what was going on, and to make sure my emotions were in check. And now I think I’m ready to help explain where I think things have gone wrong.

There happens to be a girl many years younger than I who was feeling the same way I was – being attacked by so many people, being pushed with no rest, exhausted from having to defend herself. The message came clearly in her Facebook post and the response from someone questioning the selection of beliefs, specifically pertaining to the lack of support on the same sex marriage issue.

I really thought about it before I posted this time, and I provided a very prominent issue among different Christians about the “clean” and “unclean” foods. I stated it as the fact that many Christians don’t support eating pork. Some claim that because it is an Old Testament law, that we no longer have to follow that distinction. Although many Christians disagree on this issue, we don’t hate our own family members just because they eat differently than ourselves. The best way to influence anyone in a positive way is through a loving manner. I also added that I grew up as a hunter’s daughter. When I turned vegetarian, my grandfather was convinced I would die. In fact, for the almost 10 years I was vegetarian, the very first question he would ask me is if I was healthy and had gone back to eating meat yet. The amount he would try to sneak meat onto my plate was crazy. He did not support my eating habits whatsoever. But he never stopped loving me. In fact, I can’t recall a day in my life where I did not feel loved by my grandfather, and that’s the way it should be.

To go a little further than that, she said she was going to put it bluntly and ask how same sex relationships is one law we believe from the Old Testament, but there were a host of others such as wearing jewelry, having tattoos, and premarital sex were things most Christians don’t follow anymore, yet we can choose to not stand for the same sex marriage issue.

This is where it truly sank in. The reason I believe that most people are so angry with Christians and our beliefs is because we have compromised on so much! Seriously, look around at your churches. I know for a fact that people drink, do drugs, party, have non-marrital sex with people regardless of being married or not, have problems with pornography, steal, cheat people out of money, etc, etc… There are people in almost every church who are the kings and queens of gossip. Churches are seen as judgemental because they’ve become that way. What have we done to ourselves?

Now, I’m not saying that all churches or even all people are this way. I do believe we have the sweetest, loving Christians still on this earth, and unfortunately that’s something we desperately need more of. But when Christians in themselves are out in the world claiming to be Christian and yet are caught in such horrible acts, what else is the world to think of us? Can you really blame people for hosting anger when they grew up in a church but like my sister, left because people were judging the clothing she wore? Do you really think that made her feel at home rather than winning her over with love? Personally, I’m ashamed at some of the things we’ve done to people. We should be opening our doors and welcoming, not just greeting, but truly welcoming people into our midst with the goal of letting love take over. When Jesus saved the prostitute, or sat with the tax collectors, you don’t see Him attacking them. He loved them and that’s what created the difference. Why can’t we do the same?

Of course I’m not saying we should kick out all of the people who are having problems either. What better place to receive help with healing than a church family, as long as we are being just that – a loving and supportive family.

Now, I know my beliefs may differ from yours, and that’s ok. Like I said, I have no judgement. The Bible, unfortunately, is not the most easily understood book at times, and some is left to our interpretation though hopefully somewhat unfolded with divine help (always pray before reading the Bible!). So yes, topics like jewelry and tattoos are a little more difficult to defend for some. However, I know the Bible clearly points out that our bodies are the living temples for the Holy Spirit, and we are to take care of them to the best of our abilities. Putting needles unnecessarily into my body, causing a stain that God did not put there in the first place that is ridiculous to remove, and putting holes all over my body does not seem like preserving the “holy temple” as God stated it. To me, that is clear enough definition as to why those are not the best idea. Jewelry that does not require holes (such as necklaces, rings, and bracelets) are a little more in the grey area. However, if you look at history, you will see that only the rich, and those who placed themselves above others wore jewelry. So at the time, it made total sense that jewelry was a way to separate the classes of people, and as far as I’ve read in my Bible, God doesn’t view us that way, nor does He want us to develop an attitude of being better than others. So to me, that makes sense. When it comes to premarital sex, it’s a no-brainer to me. You don’t need a Bible to tell you it’s not the best idea. Look up science reports and the reactions in the brain with sex. Look up psychology reports. The more sex you have before marriage, the less you are bringing to your marriage. Imagine if everything was brand new coming into your marriage. No past relationships to discuss, no past comparisons to make, nothing bad to bring into your forever relationship. I think in a way, we’ve lost sight of how sacred and special marriage was supposed to be. It was a union, a joining of two people. And in Mark 10:9, it states clearly, “Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.” We say vows, vows that are actually supposed to mean something. God blessed the union between husband and wife and specifically said that NO MAN (that means nobody on this earth) should be able to separate that union. I don’t know about you, but there are an awful lot of divorces going on. A lot of “man” separating what God told us not to. And that’s in the New Testament, not even the old.

Again, I hope you are not taking offence to this. I am the product of a divorced family who married other divorced people. Divorce is around me, and although I love my family more dearly than anything, I will fight with all I have to preserve my marriage union because I believe that is what is right. (I may continue this conversation at another time. It’s a whole separate Bible study.)

So those are my thoughts. I’m not sure if Christians will ever recover. If we’re going to stand for our beliefs, we need to learn not to compromise. No, it’s not easy being criticized. If anything, becoming vegan has opened my eyes to a whole new way of being criticized (not enough protein, not losing weight fast enough, not going to be healthy, etc…). But if you truly believe in something and seek to receive the rewards at the end, then you need to stand for whatever it is. But remember to stand in a loving way. Hate is fuel to the fire, but love (usually) softens the hardest of hearts. So speak to and treat each other in love, regardless of what a person chooses, but stay strong to yourself and don’t compromise on the beliefs you hold. Nobody in this world has the right to force their beliefs on people. But rather, keep an open ear and seek to find the Truth, and once you have the Truth, hold on to it. As humans, we are master justifiers, master liars, and master convincers. Don’t let someone talk you out of being yourself and believing what you’ve sought to be true.

For another pastor’s perspective, I found this to be a good, well-written, loving read with Biblical back-up.
http://todaychristian.net/a-detailed-explanation-of-why-christians-dont-accept-gay-marriage/

The First True Day – What Made the Difference!

I am so proud of myself today! Today is the first day I feel totally confident saying I ate a true Rawtill4 diet!

Here’s what I ate:

Breakfast/Snack : 2.63L of pulpy orange juice

Lunch: 6 Bananas blended with water and 1/4 cup of coconut sugar

Afternoon Snack: 1 cup dried banana

Supper: Burrito Bowl (Brown beans, black beans, brown rice, green pepper, pico de galo, mild salsa, cilantro, guacamole, lime vinaigrette)

I feel so good today! So good! But it got me thinking… what made today so much better than other days? One main answer: I had the equipment available and things ready to go!

Think about it: Drinking orange juice is easy. When a blender is clean and ready to go, it’s super easy to throw everything in and blend it up. And then for supper, when you have a little more time, throwing some things together in a bowl.

I’m so satisfied and happy with this diet, and my digestion has been changing today too… for the better I’m sure!

I’m excited! Feel free to ask questions about my change in food choices, and anything you may be curious about!

So Happy! It’s Been A Long Time Coming…

So yesterday was our second attempt at getting my husband’s permanent residency. Instead of being 1/2 hour early like last time, we were a full hour early. You would think there would have been less people, and though there may have been a little less, there were still quite a few people there. My thoughts were quite honestly: “How early do these people come in the morning?”

We were fortunate in the fact that almost every single one of those people were there to write their citizenship tests. We were actually the first ones in line for the immigration interview, which of course meant after the office finally opened and officers finally showed up to do interviews, we were the first ones called in.

It was nothing like what I had expected! We showed the officer our papers (receipts, passport, letter, pictures) and she asked us 3 questions each: Have you ever been asked to leave Canada? (My equivalent was where I was born), Do you have any dependents? and Have you been convicted of a crime in Canada? We only had the one incident where the border patrol and immigration didn’t agree when my husband was told he should leave by the border patrol but was told he never should have left by immigration, and I was a little worried about that. But I do know and firmly believe it is better to be honest than try to hide something. So I was anxious at this point to see what she would say which turned out to be nothing other than “So they asked you to leave and then asked you to come back?” Yup. That’s pretty much it.

She entered a lot of things into the computer, printed some papers, asked if we had any questions for her, signed some papers, was instructed on the steps from here, and was out of her office by 9:30 with proof of residency for my husband! Ahhhh!!!! For those of you who have been following our 2 1/2 year struggle with Immigration, this was such a happy day for us! He can’t leave the country yet as we still have to wait for his PR card to come in the mail, but that paper is proof and promise that it is coming and he can finally go see his family this summer. I’m so excited!!!

Immigration – 1 Week’s Notice

Most of you have followed the extensive and complicated journey my husband and I have had with Immigration. From the amount of research we’ve had to do, to the amount of paperwork, to the discrepancy amongst government opinions and directions, to losing our papers. However, we now have announcements for the next chapter.

On Wednesday evening, my husband checked his e-mail and he had not one, but two letters from the government. The first one said he had been approved for his permanent residency application and would be contacted for further instructions. The second e-mail gave us a one week’s notice for an interview (happening this Thursday) that we both need to be there for. It was easy enough for us both to get the day off, although not ideal. But as I kept reading, I realized that should either of us be late or not show up, our paperwork may be tossed. He also needed to bring a copy of the letter with him, needed to bring new PR pictures (which we had to get done) AND pay the “Right of Permanent Residence Fee” of $490 BEFORE the interview so that we could bring a copy of the receipt. Oh my goodness… one week to get $490 that I didn’t really have. It’s not like that added any stress or anything…

So that’s where we sit. I’m incredibly nervous although everything is printed and ready to go. We both have our days booked off and really have nothing else to prepare that I know of. But I’m incredibly nervous. He’s supposed to know whether he’ll be a resident after this interview or not. Of course I’m praying HEAVILY that he is. This has been such a long journey. I would completely break down if it didn’t go well. But have you heard the same things I have heard about this interview?

I’ve talked to others, and they have told me that they were separated and asked questions with such minute details such as: What colour is your partner’s toothbrush? Where do they squeeze the toothpaste (i.e. middle, roll from the end, etc…)? I have no idea what they’re going to ask us, but I hope we can prove to them that we are not simply a marriage of convenience, but that we are married because we love each other. Ah! Please pray for us!

Do you have any details about a permanent residence interview you had experienced? I would love to hear from someone about what happened in your situation!

Teaching: What They Say Is True

Teaching is the only job (and I’ve been reminded of it a lot lately) where it can take more work to call in sick than to actually go to work.

It was a long weekend, so I had time to prepare for Tuesday, not that it was an easy task, but it got done. Wednesday morning, I felt mildly better, but knew I should probably still call in sick. But, I couldn’t wrap my mind around getting sub plans done and hence, decided to toughen up and go to work. What a mistake!

Besides the fact I was coughing all day, slowly losing my voice (albeit very slowly), and sweating as well as feeling miserable, I somehow managed to survive the day. The only thing was, I had a funny feeling I was sabotaging my recovery by pushing myself throughout the day. So I did the smart thing, and prepared sub plans throughout the day and finished them after school before coming home.

I really wasn’t sure if I had made myself worse or not, so I simply laid out the sub plans, wrote a few letters to some students that I had to ask questions to and didn’t get the chance, and instructed a student to make sure a couple things got done incase the sub forgot. Everything was in place, just incase. I did not ask for a sub yet, just incase.

Of course, this morning I wake up so tired. I had awoken several times throughout the night coughing up a storm. My throat felt like it had gravel stuck in it and dry as a desert at the same time. At times, I was coughing so hard, tears were running down my face. There was absolutely no way I was going to work and I definitely did damage going to work yesterday.

But the good news was, I didn’t have to worry about sub plans again because they were already done, so I couldn’t talk myself out of going: the looming task was done! And now I’m at home, taking medicines, both natural and over-the-counter, trying to recover and finally kick whatever it is that I have. After waking up this morning (from coughing again) and messaged my VP that I needed a sub, I managed to fall back asleep (fell asleep before saying good-bye to my husband because I was so exhausted) and slept for a few solid hours. I’m tired again already, but I at least don’t have to worry about anything except getting better. Sometimes you just need time to rest and recover.