How Did I End Up Here?

Guys, I’m going to be very open and real with you in this post. It is very early in the morning, and I’ve already been awake for over an hour. I can’t sleep. I woke up from a terrible dream. …

Green Juice Feasting – Healing Journey Day 45

Journal:
I actually woke up excited for today. Some people may think that today wouldn’t be so great because I’m going back to juicing instead of having actual food, but honestly, I have come to really enjoy juicing as a form of giving your body a break from digesting food. It definitely provides a cleansing day.

Now, today I tried to space out my juices because not only are juices generally lower calorie, but because they are green juices, they are even lower calorie due to the greens content. So here is the schedule in which I drank the juices:

8:00 am – Skinny Glow (melon, apple, cucumber, spinach, celery)

9:40 am – After Glow (spinach, cucumber, celery, kale, apple, parsley)

11:10 am – Glow Boost (spinach, kale, cucumber, broccoli, mint, pomegranate)

1:40 pm – Ener-G Glow (pear, spinach, cucumber, celery, chlorophyll)

3:00 pm – Sky Glow (pear, cucumber, kale, lemon, mint)

5:00 pm – Peak Performance (apple, cucumber, kale, spinach, lemon, parsley)

6:45 pm – Emerald City (spinach, apple, celery, cucumber)

8:30 pm – Everglades (cucumber, celery, cilantro, lime, apple)

Why were some of my juices called “Glow”? Because I purchased them from Glow Juicery. It is an awesome place where they made cold-pressed juices that are raw and unpasteurized. They also make smoothies and raw foods to eat. I love this store and highly recommend you check them out!

The last three juices I drank were from a place called Splash Juicery which is also an amazing, organic, cold-pressed juice place. They also serve smoothies, raw desserts and raw meals. I just recently found out about this place and I’m so thankful I tried them out! Absolutely recommended as well!

So the odd thing was, I start getting a headache just before I started drinking my second juice of the day. I never get headaches. My eyes have been giving me some really bad troubles in the past week, and I fear I may be headed to some trouble I don’t want. I’ve pretty much stopped wearing my sunglasses so I can get as much Vitamin D to my eyes as possible, and I still need to cut down on the computer time. I can’t lose my vision… it’s time to get serious. I think some extra sleep would also help my case.

The headache feeling did go away, thankfully. I made it through the rest of the day pretty well, though I was unusually hungry. It’s amazing what happens when you’re used to eating a huge volume of vegetables and fruit so the compact amount of green juices. I can’t wait to eat again!

I did make it to the gym today and had an awesome workout (yes, even hungry and with only consuming green juices). I did squats, lunges, jump squats, dumbbell pullovers, bench push-ups, lateral raises, standing scarecrow, cable hammer curls, and cable tricep extensions. I then finished up my workout with 20 minutes on the stairclimber. Wowee! It felt so good to workout again. I honestly love being in the gym.

And that pretty much wraps up my night. I’ve got a lot of work to do in order to meet a deadline tomorrow (two papers that need completed), so I gotta get finishing those. I just have my Everglades drink left to finish, and then that’s it for me today. Tomorrow begins days 1 of 3 days drinking green smoothies and I’m excited!

Review of Symptoms:
-Acne is bad.
-Hair is good, but scalp needs exfoliated/massaged.
-Energy is really good.
-A little tired, but due to lack of sleep.
-Eyes are not good… too much computer and not enough sleep.
-Hungry!!
-Digestion is getting better again.
-Endurance is good!

Weight at the end of the day = 168 lbs (same as yesterday)

Total Calories = 1329 (84% carbs, 6% fat, 10% protein… these are STELLAR macros!)

Vegan Journey Update

Ok. I have LOVED seeing everyone’s vegan success posts! I fully believe in a vegan lifestyle and have taken much backlash for it. I began my vegan journey in June/July 2015. I had a week’s transition where I was battling cravings for cheese. Who knew I’d hit severe withdrawal over a food.

At first, I was leaning towards a more RawTill4 version, but found also that I had addictions to cooked lunches. So then it was more of a raw breakfast with cooked meals afterwards.

I did alright until the fall when I started teaching again and began buying a lot more pre-made vegan foods and trying more vegan junk foods.

Prior to all of this, I had won a fitness competition at my lowest weight of 129 lbs (I believe… my husband seems to remember a different number in the 120 lbs range). I won free coaching for two months and did fairly well continuing to stick with an extremely low carb, higher protein and moderate fat meal plan but my results stalled and as I started avoiding meals just so I didn’t have to keep eating the same things, my results started to reverse.

I found a group on FB with a coach that designed his own workout plans and diet. Many people have seen results on his plans, so I decided to enter this challenge as well. About half way through, I was tired of being tired. I was tired of being unhappy with my food. I was tired of always restricting. And when I finally asked the coach why I was no longer losing weight, he told me to cut my calories down even more. I think I thought about it for two days before deciding that I’m not doing this anymore and I’m going to “intuitive eat”.

Now, my intuitive eating was not a binging session. I don’t think I’ve ever binged. But I did start eating whatever foods I wanted with no regards to macro counting. Obviously this included more cheese for my cheese addiction. Needless to say, I started gaining weight.

After awhile, I started being so unhappy because I knew something was wrong and that there had to be something better for our bodies than this. With my dissatisfaction, and being vegetarian for many years before entering the bodybuilding/fitness world, I started looking at being vegan. I researched for days, watched YouTube videos by the hour. I finally had found what made sense to me. Hence my journey began in June/July 2015.

Though I’ve enjoyed the success stories, I’ve always wondered what was going wrong. When I first switched to vegan, my weight slowly kept creeping up until I hit my all-time high over Christmas at 196 lbs. Sure, it’s easy to say you shouldn’t worry about the weight, but from winning my competition at 129 lbs to gaining up to 196 lbs, I’m sure you can understand the mental troubles this can give you, especially when your husband thinks your current diet is to blame.

Deep in my heart, I knew this was the right way to eat so I didn’t give up. Sure, I indulged a little in junk over Christmas Break since we went on vacation to Colorado, but I never quit being vegan, and at home I have been cooking more than before and eating as much whole, plant-based foods as possible.

Since Christmas, I just wanted to see the scale move down into the 180s. That’s not a huge fat loss, but enough for some confirmation. Since Christmas, I have found my all-time best routine. I get up at 4 am, go to the gym, do my workout fasted: usually 1 to 1 1/2 hours of weights and 30 minutes of cardio, come home, eat breakfast because I’m usually starving after the gym, take care of my dogs, get stuff ready for my husband, get myself ready for work, go to work (elementary teacher), come home or stay at work after and do what needs to be done. It honestly gives me so much energy for the day. Yes, physically I have felt a difference for sure! No more coffee, never tired except for at night, no stomach issues, etc.

Yesterday in the gym, while doing lateral raises, I thought I noticed a slight difference in my chest/shoulder area. My shoulder muscles are starting to show again like they used to (though there is still fat covering them that needs to go). Then when I was doing shrugs, I noticed the top half of my stomach area (chest down to “love handles”) is actually slim (I carry all my fat in my bottom part of my stomach). For once, I could see/vision myself athletically fit and not stare at myself with criticism. However, I will say that until this point, the scale had barely moved (though I do not check everyday).

This morning, and yes, I know the scale isn’t everything, but what I saw was confirmed. I am back on the 180s side at 189! 7 1/2 months of keeping faith that this is the right way, and I’m finally starting to see results and not just feel them. I am so happy!

I just wanted to share my story for anyone else who may get frustrated that their weight is not coming off. Being active and eating whole foods is honestly the best way to go. You will feel the results first, and that’s what counts. The physical results will come later. I haven’t had a blood test done yet to make sure all of my levels are ok, but that is on my to-do list. All I know is I feel great, my strength and endurance have actually increased in the gym, and I will never eat/live another way again!

From Feeling “Trapped” to Feeling “Free”

My husband and I (and our pups) just spent the last two days driving back up to Canada from the states. The past two weeks in the states have been phenomenal to say the least. I’ll write a post stating more of what we did later, but I experienced something tonight that I needed to feel, something I didn’t know would be possible for a very long time.

In high school, I lived in the “big city”. It was nice for the duration I was here, but when I left, I swore never to move back. I am a small town girl, and the big city is just not my scene.

When I graduated from university, I was able to get a job for the first year in a small town. Bingo! But when that maternity leave position ran up, so did my other plans.

I received a phone call from my superintendent that I had an interview scheduled in the “big city” on such-and-such a date at such-and-such a time. I hadn’t even been asked, I had simply just been told.

On that day, I drove to the city, did my interview, and of course, got the job. I couldn’t believe what was happening. The one place I never wanted to end up was the one place I was being told I had to be. I was angry for a very long time.

Eventually, I got to the point where I simply went around saying “God certainly has a sense of humour!” But my one year employment turned into two, then three, and currently on year four.

Reflecting on it, I knew God wanted me to be here. There were certain situations I had to encounter as a teacher to grow. There were painful moments I had to experience to become wiser. There were children who needed someone to advocate for them, and there were relationships built with students who just needed someone to listen that wouldn’t judge them. I was able to fill that place. As much as they think they have learned from me, I learned ever so much from them.

This year, when my big change from 6th grade to 2nd grade came, I couldn’t believe it was happening. As much as 6th graders stressed me out, I loved the counselling aspect; I loved the difficult questions. I felt like a stranger in grade 2. But of course, as time went on, it became easier and I was able to find aspects I liked. But I couldn’t help thinking, is this really where I’m supposed to be? Is this really what I’m still supposed to do?

I can’t really say it’s teacher’s burnout (though I’m sure some things are similar). It’s just the feeling of being “stuck”. No matter how many ways I looked at our situation financially, I could see no better opportunity to survive than where we were. We both hate living in the city, though I’ve come to see good parts about it and don’t hate it as bad as I used to. But when I can hear parts of my neighbour’s conversations, when my neighbours that I strive to be so nice to turn around and stab me in the back, and when I no longer see a way that Canadians are nicer than Americans anymore (sad reality from what I see here in the city), I know we aren’t really happy here. It’s not where either one of us want to be. So that’s when I realized something this weekend.

When we were finally finishing our drive, doing the same maneuvers through the city as we had done for years, we had come to the house, walked in, and I suddenly felt like I was in someone else’s house. I felt like a stranger walking into someone else’s life. It was a strange feeling. My husband did not experience the same thing, but for some reason, it was like I was that “spirit” looking at someone else’s world, an outsider looking in. Of course that feeling is over now, but that wasn’t the only feeling that came.

After driving for 2 days, we absolutely did not have the energy to go grocery shopping. So we went out for supper (our fridge is bare). On the way home from supper, it hit me. This city is no longer my jail. I no longer feel like I strapped to this city, unable to move. I no longer feel like the city is the pit that is going to swallow me whole to keep me here with no escape. I suddenly realized, with options my husband, my mother-in-law, and myself had talked about after Christmas break, the world is at our fingertips. It may not be a fun ride to make change, but to get out of the rut of tiredness, depression, and feeling “stuck”, a few months of painful change would be so worth it. It’s no longer an impossibly large, looming, unattainable vision, it is now a totally possible, difficult but doable task. And taking those chains off was the best feeling I could have ever experienced.

I know this post is kind of vague, but this year is a huge year of change. I cannot leak more information than is timely, but I can assure you this year is going to difficult but good. Stay tuned!

How Much Are We Affecting Our Children?

I saw a commercial tonight that struck me so differently than any other commercials before. All the time we see the World Vision commercials and other organization’s commercials that are reaching out with the dire situations of children all over the world. I support organizations that help others, don’t get me wrong. My father sponsored a child when we were younger who would write us letters with the aid of a translator. She would also send pictures of our money helping to clothe her and send her to school. Helping others is great and we should never become immune to the fact that others need our help. But it also can’t be denied that these commercials are common-day, and we are used to turning past them all the time.

The commercial I saw tonight hit home.

It was a commercial based on North America, on OUR children, on the damage WE do to them. And I just sunk in my chair (couch). It was a commercial that showed the pictures of women on magazines, in commercials, articles of the fastest ways to lose weight, and even a scene where one little girl asked another if she was ready for bikini season.

Wow.

You hear stories all the time of how these things affect women, but to think that they even affect little girls! But when you sit and think of it, how true it is! Many girls are worried about being popular in school, are bullied, are made fun of, etc… and the same thing goes for boys. They grow up seeing these images of what makes a “perfect woman/man” or a “perfect girl/boy” and at earlier and earlier ages, they are striving to look like this.

I have known it’s been an epidemic that girls are maturing earlier and earlier, I see this in school with the passing years and generations. I guess it never occurred to me the depth of diet and appearance on girls even as early as 8 or 9 years old! Possibly even younger! Is that what we want to do to our children?

I think it’s a way of teaching our children to grow up with insecurities. We are setting them up to attain images that are almost always photoshopped while always feeling not good enough.

We need to change this.

We need to raise our children knowing that they are good enough. Now that doesn’t mean feeding them a greasy pizza everyday. Make healthy eating fun. Incorporate as many fruits and veggies as you can daily so kids are not afraid to eat them and don’t grow up thinking they are boring and gross. Make being healthy and active a fun part of everyday life. And most importantly, give them so much love that they will know people’s opinions don’t matter. They are special and important and perfect just the way they are!

Acupuncture: My First Time!

So, yesterday I went to the chiropractor for my weekly visit. I didn’t mention anything to her about how my week had gone as far as my bones and problems. She was so excited telling me about the school her son had managed to get into with an amazing teacher and a sport’s program that allows her son the extra movement he needs. 

Then she got to my neck, shoulders, and ribs, and her face dropped. She asked me how my week had been. And I had to tell her that my rib had been popping significantly more than usual, possibly more than ever, and that I had been waking up at 4 in the morning without fail, even though I would go to feel without feeling stressed or thinking of anything. Let’s just say, I’ve never seen someone look at me with such concern (aside from my mom of course). 

Sorry for the blurs on this picture, but there was honestly no better picture that described my chiropractor’s look yesterday.

The chiropractor uses a tool she calls the “Thumper”. It basically gives a little kick to areas where smaller bones exist and it helps to put the little bones in place. I have NEVER had her use it on my ribs before, but it was bad enough that she did. In fact, she continued to comment how even my neck looked tighter and how everything was (and really get this) WORSE than the FIRST time I ever walked in her clinic! Woah.

So she asked me about acupuncture. To be honest, I never thought I would ever do acupuncture. The thought of having tonnes of needles in me just is not a vision I wanted to live. But my chiropractor recommended acupuncture and upon consideration, I agreed if it would help. So instead of booking a later appointment, she went next door and arranged for an appointment right then. Talk about being serious!

The acupuncturist went through everything in great detail, expressing that it is NOT PAINFUL, but would feel–if anything–like a mosquito bite initially and then should feel like nothing. She also explained some precautionary things, but it made total sense to me. Key point? Don’t move when the needles are in you! Makes total sense, eh?

So we got to the process. She put needles in my neck, my shoulders, my back, and my ankles. To be quite honest, I hardly felt most of them. The ones I felt the most were in my ankles, but I have incredibly non-fat feet. They are very thin and boney. And even so, only the one in my ankle seemed to bother me a little, the other ones were no big deal.

These needles are the same width as a piece of hair!! So tiny!

And my acupuncturist? Amazing. She continued to ask if I was ok, if everything felt ok, if I ever felt sick, etc… She was there every step of the way and made me feel like I was in amazing good hands. 

I basically laid there, face down, breathing and relaxing. She even encouraged sleeping! But my face was fairly squished in the bed. I’m assuming the massage bed was fairly new because the material around where your face goes was pretty stiff. So no sleeping, but I was able to relax with a heat lamp making sure I was warm.  She even took great deal afterwards to massage the right places after she removed the needles (painless) and makes sure you get up slowly and carefully to make sure your body is handling the process properly. 

Basically the position I was in for the 20-30 minutes. I think I may line it with something more “cushy” next time.

Boy did I feel tired afterward! And I slept like a baby last night! 

It’s something I’ve been so scared of for so long, and yet it was not painful at all and helped me so much. If you have any problems (I was treated for stress and lack of sleep), you should definitely try it. It’s so worth it. Just watch that the clinic you go to is sanitary, they use new needles each time, and the person knows what they’re doing and can answer any questions that you have.

Have you ever tried acupuncture before? What were your thoughts?