Summer Days of Fruitrition 3b/7 – Healing Journey Day Day 66

Journal:
I did not plan on taking two days to do the Wednesday schedule. But as you can tell from yesterday’s blog post, I never did finish the day. So today ended up being a catch-up day. And in the end, I only ended up eating two big meals which is extremely odd for me, but it worked and tomorrow will be day 4.

This morning, I made the mango tacos. It’s done simply by chopping up some mangoes and tomatoes and eating them wrapped in lettuce leaves. For this, I used Romaine lettuce. It was decent. My mangoes are not the greatest quality which is providing it’s own issues. Tommy Atkins mangoes are just not my favourite.

mangtac

A while later, I felt peckish, so I ate the snack from day 4 which was figs. Again, since we do not have fresh figs at this time, I had to eat dried figs which were really good on their own.

figs

Now, my eyes were really bothering me today. Again, spending way too much time working on the computer and Skyping with family lately. I’m also still not sleeping as much as I should be, and my eyes are suffering. So this afternoon, I took my dog on a longer walk and spent some time laying in bed just resting my eyes.

By the time supper came around, I could either continue on Day 4, or leave the 3 main meals to do a real day 4 tomorrow. So that’s what I decided and ate some rice for supper. The good news is, I’m almost out of rice. In fact, there may only be one serving left. And once it’s gone, I won’t eat it anymore. But to ensure success for tomorrow, I made sure to prep the mangoes for tonight. I am good to go! Day 4, here I come!

Review of Symptoms:
-Acne is bad.
-Tired.
-Eyes are exhausted.
-Chest is sore from workout yesterday, but in a good way!
-Felt “off” today. Drank lots more water than normal, but not 100% sure why.

Weight at the end of the day = 167.8 lbs (up 0.4 lbs from yesterday which actually surprises me though it may be the extra water I drank since my body is finally getting what it wants)

Total Calories = 1972 (91% carbs, 2% fat, 7% protein)

Summer Days of Fruitrition 3/7 – Healing Journey Day 65

Journal:
We are back on track! I woke up super tired. I definitely went to bed too late, but the menu was completed and sent so that my family could buy their groceries today. I am praying for them!

So, something happened this morning that I have not talked about in this blog. But I believe this part is crucial for FEMALES who may be embarking on a journey similar to mine, so I will comment about it as of today. Today, I got my period. Yes, I know, that seems like no big deal. But it is a big deal when I tell you that I haven’t had my period for 94 days. I knew I wasn’t pregnant, and I knew it could happen because of my change in diet. Although I enjoyed not having it for so long, I was prepared for it to come back at any time. I do the fertility awareness method (check it out here: http://www.tcoyf.com) but had slacked for awhile so even though I could have probably been able to tell when it would come, my lack of tracking made it slightly more difficult to tell. Was I worried when I didn’t get my period? No. If something was really wrong, I would have noticed something different. But I didn’t notice anything different; I felt great, didn’t feel like I was lacking anything except water, and it is fairly common for people who go raw. I’ve also done some research online of people who even question how “normal” a typical period is and I must say it is fascinating. I encourage you to do some research of your own. 🙂

So this morning, I went with the Summer Days of Fruitrition Wednesday schedule. That meant blending up some strawberries and mangoes this morning to make a “fruity soup.” I didn’t follow the exact proportions, but it really did turn out so good. I could see making this soup throughout the summer regularly.

strawmang

For lunch, I chopped up 6 bananas and blended up 1 lb of strawberries to pour over the bananas as a strawberry sauce. It was honestly so simple, but so good.

banstraw

Because I got in a bit of a “rush” to get to the gym and back, I indulged in a bit of rice. I am figuring out that part of my issue is prep time. No, I know I don’t seem to be “fixing” everything as quickly as expected, but part of the ability to fix things is to understand why they are happening. My last meal was going to be chopped up mangoes and tomatoes eaten in cups of lettuce. That’s a lot of prep whereas rice you just throw in a pot. Perhaps if my primary food was a different fruit, I wouldn’t have to spend as much time to eat. But, I’m going to keep going.

I had a superb workout. I did a full body workout, hitting each muscle group with at least one exercise. I finished up the session by doing some HIIT cycling. I felt SO GOOD. I missed the gym. I loved being back. But, they did rearrange the whole gym set up, so it took awhile to adjust my bearings and find all the equipment and benches I needed. But I did it, and I loved it.

After the workout, I was dangerously hungry… which led me to pick up a salad on the way home. Guys, this is huge. I easily could have picked up a sub where I would have had bread for the same price, but I went with a salad, no bread included. I am honestly so proud and amazed at myself that I’m picking such better food than I normally would have. I have changed, big time!

However, it fell apart – a bit – once I got home. Salads that you buy are usually much smaller than what you would make for yourself at home, and so, it didn’t fill me up. So as soon as I got home, I made some peanut butter dates, rice, and junk (aka finished the vegan ice cream in the freezer). I was ravenous! Crazy. Honestly crazy. If I was a binger, this would have been my binge. But, it’s over and I’m not replacing these junk foods that I’m eating. So, if they aren’t in the house, I won’t eat them. And that’s going to be a strategy going forward.

Review of Symptoms:
-Acne is bad.
-Hunger was ravenous after the gym.
-I actually got my period after 94 days!!
-Can tell I need to drink more water.
-Excellent strength and endurance in the gym.

Weight at the end of the day = 167.4 lbs (same as yesterday)

Total Calories = 2739 (87% carbs, 8% fat, 5% protein… I ate a lot!!)

Winter Days of Fruitrition 1/7 -Healing Journey Day 63

Journal:
Every time. It honestly happens every time. Whenever I eat too late, and eat cooked foods in the evening, I wake up the next day with pain in my stomach. You’d think I would learn. Anyways…

So if you were paying attention to the title of this blog post, you’ll notice that I jumped from the second day of summer days to a day of the winter days. Why would I switch weeks for a day? Because I had a delivery of 11 persimmons in my Organic Box, and planned on them coming unripe so they would have a week to ripen. Well, they came completely gooey and ripe so I couldn’t leave them for a week before using them without losing them. So I had to put in a high persimmon consumption day out of the winter week in order to use them. Thankfully, Freelee’s guide is easy to follow so it’s not too hard to just pick a day and go. So that’s what I did.

So this morning, I needed to have soaked dates in order to make Datorade. However, I did not have it done and of course, my hungry stomach led me back to the fridge to look for any quick foods I had, which ended up being some cooked foods again. My weakness is the morning and the late evening. It’s time to assess and plan! Fail to plan, plan to fail. There’s a lot of truth to that statement.

I waited a couple hours for the food to digest (and the dates to soak) before I made my Datorade. I put in a little less water than last time and it definitely helped with the flavour. However, I could tell in my gut almost instantly that this was not going to be the greatest. If you’re going to have cooked foods, it’s best to eat them at the end of the day because they digest slower than quick-moving fruits.

datorade

After finishing the Datorade, I went to town to pick up a few groceries. As I was out, I noticed I started feeling a little off, actually something like what I would assume low blood sugar would feel like though I’ve never been diagnosed with it. I ended up going to the gym and grabbing a Red Sunrise from Booster Juice. Almost instantly it helped and I felt much better. I’m really not sure what to think of this…

After I got home, I made a large salad using a head of iceberg lettuce, 5 bananas (sliced), and some dates chopped up. Honestly friends, though this salad was super simple and did not have any dressing, it was the BEST thing I’ve eaten in a very long time; so fresh and sweet. It was so delicious and amazing. I cannot recommend it more!!

bandatlet

Later in the evening, instead of going after the fruit I know I should have been eating, I let my craving for cooked food take me over and made some low fat, cooked, vegan food. It’s amazing how addicted you get to cooked food, truly. You don’t think things can control you until you literally live through it. It boggles my mind…

For a late night snack, I pulled the fruit back out. I managed to eat 3 persimmons that were ooey, gooey and sweet. However, I was pretty full with a growly stomach as things started combining in bad ways. People, there is a reason that food combining rules exist, and I completely blew them today. Learn from my mistakes…

persimmon

I did watch the documentary, Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead today. I had watched it before, but it’s always good to review. It’s such a powerful testimony of what food can do for our bodies in the way of healing. To give our bodies a break and feed ourselves on a cellular level is crucial. I will never regret my juicing days because I know they helped my body. In fact, I felt some of my best on my juicing days and feel like it would be an awesome idea to juice every so often. I highly recommend it.

fatsick

I also watched the documentary, The Drop Box. Wow… it broke my heart. I believe that God gives life as a gift and it breaks my heart to see so many babies easily “abandoned.” I have the utmost respect for Pastor Lee and what he does. I pray that he always gets the help he needs.

thedropbox

Review of Symptoms:
-Stomach not good from cooked foods
-Acne is bad.
-Energy was decent, but a low blood sugar dip might have occurred….
-Hair is GREASY at the roots and I’m not liking it!

Weight at the end of the day = 169 lbs (same as the past three days)

Total Calories = 2502 (78% carbs, 11% fat, 11% protein)

Mono-Juice Feasting (Nectar)- Healing Journey Day 12

Journal:
You know, everyday I write this blog post to keep you up-to-date on my journey, I can’t believe how much time has gone by since I’ve actually taken a bite of something. Never in my wildest dreams would I have thought that I would do something like this. It’s totally out of my comfort zone, but I am truly benefitting from amazing self-discipline along the way. This is truly an incredible journey.

Today was a rough day. Today was the kind of day where it would have been better to just stay in bed. But with a lot of prayer and God’s ever-loving kindness to me, He gave me enough strength to get through the day. The only problem was, my dream of getting home at the end of the day and just relaxing was short-lived as I was late getting home and my dog gave me grief for the rest of the evening. I did not get any reprieve today. But even so, I do have one big thing to celebrate, and that was what I drank today.

I will soon be actually taking a bite of fruit!!!! It’s coming!! So in transition, I made today a little different than the regular juice. I, instead, had a nectar; apricot nectar to be specific. Now, remember how I had been dreading drinking more juice because it just seemed to get sweeter and sweeter? Well, this stuff was like a little piece of heaven, and it wasn’t even organic. Oh, if only I could describe what it was like to you. The thing is, I’m pretty sure I’ve had this apricot nectar before but it didn’t taste as good to me then. Now, it was perfection. Such a reprieve from anything that was too sweet before, yet still sweet enough to be satisfying. The liquid being thicker than the normal juice was also something I loved. I can tell the food is coming!!

apricot

Now, what would be interesting to find out is whether the ingredients made this more to my satisfaction. Unfortunately, it wasn’t until the end of the day that I noticed they added sugar. It amazes me that the regular juices with no added sugar would taste sweeter than this with added sugar. It’s definitely something to think about. I’ve always found it interesting to see how our body reacts to unnatural things.

I didn’t go to the gym today, but I did do a workout at home. I had a pair of 10 lb dumbbells that I used to do squats, pushups, tricep kickbacks, bicep curls, hamstring curls, lunges, shoulder press, upright rows, and wall sits. I got in a very decent workout and it helped me feel a bit better after the day I had been having.

I finished the day with a candy assembly line as we made variety bags for an upcoming softball tournament. They smelled great and for someone who hasn’t had candy in a long time, looked appetizing as well. But not once did I slip. It was a success.

How much did I drink today? 3L with no issues. In fact, I probably could have drank more… There’s got to be something to this added sugar. It’s got me thinking…

Review of Symptoms:
-Acne is pretty much the same. Perhaps a little duller, but still patiently waiting for a noticeable improvement.
-Tongue did not need scraped this morning. So happy!
-Felt good except one little stomach upset feeling that lasted about 5-10 minutes at the very end of the night. Still unsure as to what causes this.
-Energy kept up through my incredibly NOT GOOD day and even into everything I did in the evening.
-Strength was better than expected during workout.
-Elimination was good today. Perhaps my transition to nectar is also kickstarting digestion again.

Weight at the end of the day = 178.2 lbs (up 1.2 lbs from yesterday)

Total Calories = 1,536 (99% carbs, 0% fat, 1% protein)

Focus Change: From Weight to Health

I’ve almost been vegan for a year. Can you believe it? Time has gone by so quickly, and I don’t regret a second of it! So I thought I’d fill you in on my progress, and something that switched mentally along the way.

When I first went vegan, in the end of June/beginning of July 2015, I went through a week of major withdrawal; not from animal products, but from cheese! My husband ate nachos almost daily, and the smell of melted cheese would be ever so tempting. So how did I combat it? By having a piece of fruit in my hand and shoving it in my mouth… lol. You do what you have to do.

From there, it got easier. However, since I was so excited about this vegan world, I started looking for everything vegan in the grocery stores. I subscribed to a local Organic Box delivery which was the greatest thing because then I was able to select organic produce to be delivered weekly so that I always had fruit and veggies available. But as the fall came, things changed.

In the colder weather, I wanted cooked foods all the time. No problem, really. You can easily be a cooked food vegan. But, with a few complications in starting up my next school year, I started grabbing denser calorie, fast food. This meant hitting much too much of the shelves and freezers in the grocery stores. Not only was I excited that so many things were vegan, but I was able to try so many vegan products. Let’s just say, I was not paying attention to the macronutrient breakdown in any of them. My diet was very high in fat.

Now, I was already mentally transitioning from a person who had heavily counted calories, starved myself to lose weight, and pretty much obsessed with being thin to someone who was just concerned about being healthier for myself and doing what I felt God was calling me to do. That didn’t make it any easier when I found my weight still climbing. I was eating all that I cared for, reaching a state of being full but not being stuffed. I felt pretty well, but I knew the weight gain was not what I wanted. However, I continued on because it was easy to do.

Christmas came, and I was so excited to travel to the states to try some new vegan restaurants. They were AMAZING. But it hit me when my mother-in-law had to ask my husband if she should even bother asking me if I wanted to sort through some clothes of hers before she donated them. That told me right away everyone noticed my weight gain. I started to feel pretty bad.

The following two months presented me with some of the greatest stress I have had in quite awhile. My husband left for school in the states, I moved our entire apartment myself, making appointments to sell items along the way. As soon as things were finally moved, I had to prepare report cards. As soon as that was over, I had to prepare for parent-teacher interviews. Needless to say, I got really sick after that. I literally did not have a single break, and as happy as I was to be leaving our old place, I hit the point of nostalgia as it was emptied and I was doing it alone. Emotional ups and downs, zero rest, and not eating was a recipe for disaster, and a time to hit my highest weight. I knew things had to change.

I was not giving up veganism, that was not an issue. Veganism had made me feel better about pretty much everything. In fact, when I was not reminded about my weight gain, I actually felt amazing. But I knew I could do better.

With my husband in school, and I taking on all of our bills, the money was cinched tight. I had/have a very small budget which meant all those vegan junk foods were few and far between. I actually had to start cooking again! And you know what? I felt even better than before. I found out that my greatest eating pattern is eating raw throughout the day (mostly fruit) and eating a cooked meal in the evening. The cooked meal ranges from pasta to potatoes to veggies and vegan proteins, to vegan sushi, to cream of wheat, to sandwiches. They are not complicated at all, and are whole-food based. I feel vibrant and amazing and have even found a 6-day pattern of attending the gym again. And that’s when it happened: I started caring less about my weight gain.

mindchange

I knew I was bigger than I wanted to be, but I chose to trust the system. People have been through this before; I’m not the only one. God’s original diet for us was the fruits of the earth, and I was closer than ever to following that diet. I began to pray for God to not only bless my food before I ate it, but to bless my efforts in trying to eat the way He designed for us, and for my results to show to others that this is His design as well. I began to pray before workouts for the same thing. And then I continued to eat when I was hungry and stop when I was full, except this time, it was whole plant foods from home.

You know what? In less than two months, I am down 14 pounds from my heaviest. Did I cut calories at all? No. In fact, I have been logging my food everyday just to see how much I’m eating. Some days, I’m not very hungry and I only eat around 1500 calories. I don’t like to go lower than this, so that does involve an some extra food I probably wouldn’t have otherwise eaten. Some days, I’m super hungry and can eat over 3000 calories. I’m not starving my body anymore. I’m giving it the healthy nutrition it needs, and it’s working.

I’ve always worked out which you’ll see if you have followed this blog for quite awhile, so that has not changed. I’m currently doing 3 full-body circuits a week with 3 cardio sessions between and 1 rest day. I’m getting stronger, and my endurance is better. I absolutely love it.

So I’m continuing on my vegan journey, in love with it greatly. My father has started his own fitness journey and to my surprise, displayed a picture of a blender with raw vegan protein powder. He’s been making banana/protein smoothies. It’s a huge step! My mother has been trying to cut down on the animal consumption within the house, and a coworker of mine has just begun her own vegan journey as well. More and more I’m realizing that people are waking up to the reality of how great a vegan diet is, for health reasons, beliefs, ethical and environmental reasons. It is truly the greatest. And though weight loss is awesome, it beats nothing to knowing your body is healthy and going to last you a little longer. When you eat healthy, the body releases the fat that is not good. It’s a slow process, and already within the two months, I’ve had over a week of being stalled on the exact same weight. But I continued nonetheless, and it paid off with a lower weight break in the end. So take courage. If I can do this, you can too. Start researching and be awakened to the world of truth that is out there. It’s truly amazing how deceiving the world is. Get to the nitty gritty and find out for yourself; the only regret you’ll have is that you didn’t do it sooner.

Farmers Do Not Love Their Cows

I apologize that the title of this blog sounds hateful. I can assure you I don’t have farmers. For 2 years of my life, my family had our own farm. My best friend in university’s family had a beef farm, and for two years, my hairdresser and her husband had a beef farm. I don’t hate farmers in the least. But here is an argument I was part of this week.

Now, normally, I’m not such a vocal person. I’m not the kind of person who just looks for a fight or who believes everyone should think the same way I do. In fact, because of my Christian beliefs, I believe that God has given everyone the gift of free choice, and so I am not someone to take that away. Of course this gets bordered when it inflicts pain on others, but that’s a whole other topic. The fact is, in Exodus, God gave permission to eat certain animals, one of them being cows. So if you want to eat beef, I may not agree with it, but you have total right to do that. So that’s not where this argument is coming from.

What I saw this week was a picture of an almost frozen calf in a farmer’s truck. This is a typical appearance. In my two years of farming, we were up in the middle of the night to help our animals sometimes. I get the work it takes. I see the dedication farmers have. But the caption of the farmer is how much they cared/loved their cows. That’s where I had a problem.

Now, this world has problems enough with understanding what love really is. All too often we see people throwing around the “love” word without really meaning it. People date people and still keep their own needs above their partners. People get married, and stop caring for each other. This is an awful view of love. There are so many terrible views of love. One of the pure views of love that are left in the world is when I look at mothers who truly love their children. They will do anything to protect them and give them the best lives possible. That’s what love should be. Fighting for the one you love, willing to die for that person, that’s love.

Now, I know we are talking about animals and not humans, and many people do not consider them on the same level, so that’s fine. Let’s go with that. But love, in no sense of any manner, means killing the thing you love. Think of a child’s favourite toy, or an adult’s favourite car. You love that toy/car. If that object were to “die”, you would be incredibly upset and angry. These objects aren’t even alive. Yet the cows are. (This also goes for pigs/sheep/chickens, etc…)

So these ALIVE things that farmers are claiming they “love” are raised to be killed. Does that still seem like love to you? Is it caring to kill them?

I had someone tell me that ranchers and farmers are different. That’s cool. I can see they are different. That’s not a big deal to me. The ranchers say they are animal rights activists and they do what they can to give the cows the best lives they can. Well, although it does seem like a very nice gesture to give an animal the best life possible for their short lives, do you think they would call it a “good life” to live for a couple years then be killed? Would you call it a “good life” if you were raised to the age of 2 or 18 (2 year old cow = 18 years as a human) to know you would be placed with a bullet between your eyes and then cut apart for others to eat? Would you call that loving? Is that caring? Knowing you were only born to be food? I don’t think so.

I think there is such a disconnect in this world! It’s crazy! If you are willing to put all that care into an animal, taking a cow into your home to warm them up, saying that you “love” them, well, I will agree you are acting that way. But why do you stop loving them? Why does it change from this seemingly “love” feeling to a feeling of “get on my plate! Die!” Is that how you feel about your dog? Is that how you feel about your cat? Is that how you feel about your children? They’re only worth loving for so long before you get rid of them and don’t care what happens to them?

Some of you may be wondering why I have such a big deal over a simple word. But here’s the reason, people are not owning what actually happens. Sure, the cow may have a “good life” before its death date. But here’s what happens to this “beloved animal” on it’s death date. It gets taken on a usually overloaded cow trailer where they are not given water or anything of substance on the way to slaughter. Once they get to the slaughterhouse, they become terribly frightened. They hear other cows expressing their fright and just as a dog has amazing senses in the personality of humans, cows are no different. They can sense fear and know something is wrong. The “beloved” creatures are as scared as a child in the dark except darkness is easy to fix, death is not. So not only are they unloaded to this terrible place, many people abuse these animals while they are still alive, fighting with creatures who are only scared and reacting as such. Do you go in and punish your child for having a nightmare? These cows are LIVING their nightmare and being punished for it.

When the time comes to be killed, a bullet is put between their eyes. Now, according to government regulations, it’s ok if they’re not killed by that bullet as long as they are stunned and unable to move. Now, I don’t know about you, but it’s almost like a totally functioning person in a coma. These people, when out of the coma, are able to tell you things that people said because they were totally there, just not in control of their body. That’s how these cows are except they can’t tell you what people are saying, but they can tell you about the hooks that were painfully shoved through their legs. Would you like to be alive with hooks piercing your body? I’m going to guess not. Of course, the hook is not enough to kill the cow. So the next step is being sliced open down the middle of their bodies and through their neck. Mmm. What an awesome feeling while you’re still alive. So humane. Such a “loved” and “cared about” animal, right?

So here’s the thing. If you can accept what you do, and you have no problem saying cows are just money to you, that you don’t actually love them and don’t care about the violence you put them through, then by all means that’s at least not hypocritical. Again, I don’t agree with it and think it speaks volumes about the kind of person you are, but I at least appreciate the honesty. But if you advertise to the world that you are such a caring and loving person to these animals, you are so hypocritical and maybe even lying to yourself! I’m asking farmers and ranchers to take responsibility for their actions. You’re not really an animal rights activist when you’re still sending them to a bitter death. So that’s the part I have a problem with. Accept the realities of your job. Don’t just pretend that you’re doing something good for them because for all the good you did before, I guarantee the cows would choose a little less cozy life in exchange for keeping their lives. Nobody wants to die, not even animals. They are alive, they have thoughts, they are just unable to communicate to us the way we need to understand. So start thinking and accept what the truth is. That’s it. If you choose to continue to eat meat, like I said, that’s your choice. But know where that meat is coming from and what that animal is going through to get to your stomach when the world over knows a vegetarian/vegan diet is a way to thrive. You don’t need meat, you don’t need dairy products. But make your choice while being educated and not hiding the truth.

Know the truth, own your choice.

Not Being Afraid to Stand Out

I’m going to be honest again… I messed up. I knowingly ate some dairy last week. And I really have nobody to blame but myself, and that’s why I’m writing this blog post.

You see, it was my first outing with colleagues since going vegan. We were going out for supper because it was going to be a late night at work. I could have modified what I ordered, but I didn’t. And why might you ask? Because I didn’t want to appear as that person who makes 50 different modifications to their food and is a pain to take anywhere. I didn’t want to be that difficult person. And though what I chose had very little dairy, it still had it. However, it did come back to bite me.

While we were eating, the discussion, which never has gone to diets and healthy eating the years we’ve gone out before, suddenly took that turn. One colleague is doing a no sugar thing, another is doing no carbs aside from veggies after 5 (not entirely supportive of either). And yet, here I am, supposedly way more into health and fitness than anyone else, and I’m going back on what I said. I should have stuck up for myself and just ordered with my modifications because here’s the deal: I’m not making a difference for what I believe in if I’m not even living it myself. There, I said it. I was phoney. My back was weak when it came to stand up. And I regret it.

I went through this as a teenager with Christianity. Not that it was even just Christianity, but I worship on the Sabbath – Saturday. Talk about going against most of the world! But I got over it, and I got better. It’s not perfect, but it’s something I can continue to work on. Veganism is going to be the same way. I have to get stronger, and I will get stronger. But no more losing opportunities to stand out and make a difference like I did that day. From now on, whether Christianity or veganism or whatever the cause may be, I’m standing out and standing strong! Who’s with me?

I Prayed for 10 Years, and God Answered

Sometimes in life, there are things we don’t know how to approach. There are people we want to say things to to, but for some reason can’t find the right words. Sometimes, they can be missed opportunities that are missed out of fear. Sometimes, they are missed because we keep waiting for something or someone else to bring up the topic so that we have an opportunity to put in our heartfelt words that we need to say. Some people unfortunately underestimate the amount of time that is available for some things to be said.

For years I have been trying to get enough courage or find the right moment to talk to my father about God; about my views on God and trying to find out exactly where he’s at. My father believes in God, absolutely. But after learning about how awesome it is to be a child of God, that you can openly talk to God as a friend and call him Father, Papa, or even Daddy if you’d like, it left me in a state of uneasiness seeing my dad only ever refer to Him as things like “The Man Upstairs”. I didn’t get a sense of owning God, of realizing that God loved Him. But how do I bring up such a sensitive topic with my own father? I know, I know. Some of you would say that I should love my father enough to bring it up regardless, but just pause for a moment. This is my father. I care about him more than the average person I would meet and talk about God with. I don’t want to mess it up. I don’t want him to ask questions I don’t know the answer to. If I want to talk about it, I want to do it right, and there were not enough rehearsals to ever make me feel prepared.

But God changed that this summer.

Now, I think part of the reason is I had to tell my family I had turned vegan. They were used to me being vegetarian before, so in reality, vegan wasn’t much more of a step. They took the news a lot better this time than they did originally when I turned vegetarian, so I’m assuming I had them “warmed-up” for the big change.

Because I had to tell my family I was vegan, Dad asked me why I made the switch this time. I loved this question! I had the opportunity to tell my dad about the health benefits of being vegan and how much better it is. I didn’t go into incredible details of the effects on animals because my dad wasn’t there yet. But what did surprise me was one of the responses he did give me, which was simply this: “I could probably live without meat. But I guess my thing is I don’t want to. I love my steak.”

Now I know, there are definitely some people in the vegan community who would start criticizing my dad right away. I have heard and seen all the criticisms that could be used against his statement. But just hold on a second, after all, I know my dad better than you.

His statement was honest. He didn’t lie about it, he didn’t make excuses, he told the truth. He even admitted (for the first time ever) that he could probably live without meat! How big of a reality is that! This, coming from a man who literally grew up on the vegetables his mother grew in the garden, and the meat his father hunted in the woods. Even to this day, the family gets together to share moose meat if someone wins their moose license. It’s a way for them to save money and stock up the food supplies for the winter. Remember, New Brunswick’s economy is not huge by any means. And, if you think of it that way, he didn’t even go off listing a whole bunch of meats he couldn’t live without, he said one – steak. Now, I don’t support the killing of animals, I really don’t. But if he could even stop eating all other meats and only have steak once in awhile, that still saves lives! There is room for progress! So anyways, you can feel my excitement and hopefully understand it over that reply.

So I don’t know if it was because he was already asking me why I eat the way I eat or what, but he then asked me a question I have been waiting YEARS to answer, and that was about my faith. Now he didn’t ask an open-ended question such as what I believe, but he kind of asked in a weird way how my beliefs were compared to Catholicism. Now I can’t claim that he was questioning Catholicism, but I can say that he NEVER would have asked me this before. In fact, when I was baptized Seventh-day Adventist, my grandparents (his parents) told me I was playing with religions and that you should stick to the one you were born into. They are very set in following traditions which is also what the Catholic church holds onto, so I always saw my father having the same mindset.

Regardless, he opened up.

I asked him to clarify a little, and he basically asked if my beliefs had Saints like the Catholic church does, or if we pray to Mary, or those kinds of things. Now, imagine my heart bursting wide open at this point. Again, he may not be questioning things about the Catholic church that I don’t believe in, but it almost sounds like he is! So I just say no, and explain that everything we believe comes straight out of the Bible, and that we did have a “prophet” within the last century who passed all the tests as provided by the Bible as to how to recognize a true prophet or not, and though we don’t worship her or praise her, we do use her inspired teachings/writings as a deeper way to understand some of the confusing things in the Bible. After all, the Bible was written by God-inspired people. So it does make sense that somebody could have been chosen to be inspired by God again, which is why they conducted the Bible’s prophet tests on her to make sure she was truly being led by God. And I continued to explain to him that of course the Bible comes first, that we always pray to God, and that we do also believe in the Trinity: God (Father), Jesus (Son), and the Holy Spirit. But I told him (to emphasize the point) that everything we (or at least I) try to believe has to be based in the Bible, as tricky as that can be sometimes.

I’m not sure how my dad took all of that. It definitely wasn’t everything I wanted to say, but it was enough for the situation we were in. I wish I could say my dad said we’d continue the conversation later, but he didn’t. Mind you, we were in a busy situation, but I’m holding onto the fact that I’m praying God used that moment to plant seeds in my dad’s heart and mind. I’m praying that my dad will realize the greater relationship he could have with God than I think he does. I want that so bad for my dad, but as many of us know, if you push things, the person will usually retract. So for now, I’m being thankful God gave me that opportunity after so many years and will continue to pray that maybe Dad will ask me about things again so I can dive a little more into the personal relationship side of things. I’m still in awe that God did this for me, even though it has taken 10 or so years. God does answer prayer, that’s a fact.

So to end on a little extra happy note, my step mother and I have never talked about religion. I don’t really know her religious background… it’s just not usually a subject that is brought up. But even when I was driving around with her doing errands, she brought it up. And our conversation focussed more on whether the school I taught at accepted students of all walks of life, or if they could only be of our religion. We talked about how students from all walks of life do come to my school, but we don’t bend our beliefs based on theirs because they are choosing to pay and come to our school for some reason. She was curious how I taught my Bible classes, and I told her that I do respect the feelings and beliefs of all of my students, but that I’m not going to tell them to be sheep. I don’t just want them to believe things because I tell them to, because at one point, we all question what we believe. I want them to know why they believe what they believe with evidence, straight out of the Bible in black and white. I also told her that if they end up asking me a question about something I don’t know, I don’t ignore it. I either search out the answer myself, or we study it together as a class.

For example, this year my students were not into studying the life of Christ, something they’ve more or less covered since attending church as infants, but they wanted to know about the end times, about the dragon of Revelation, about what to expect. So you know what I did? Tossed my plans, and we started studying Revelation together. It was the most rewarding decision I could have made. Yes, there is some scary stuff in that book, but my students came from that book knowing so much better what to expect, what is going on in our lives, and how God is fighting for them every step of the way, wanting to protect them from every evil that is here and will come. They knew that things might get difficult for them, but that they shouldn’t fear as long as they put God first because ultimately, God is victorious and he is holding them in His hands the whole time.

I mentioned this in another blog, but it still blows my mind that two of my students who do not attend a church and do not come from religious families wrote to me at the end of the study, one saying that he had listened more than he ever thought he would, taking notes more than he ever had before, and the other saying how he’s not baptized (with a sad face) but knowing that he can do anything through the power of Christ and knowing that he can have a personal relationship with God was such good news to him. I mean, how much more powerful does it get than that! The students had questions, and God provided me the opportunity to learn and study with them. What an awesome way to be used by God!

So anyways, I guess if I can sum this up I would say, don’t be impatient. God’s timing is so much better than ours could ever be. And don’t give up. I mean, 10 years was a long time to wait for my opportunity to talk with my dad, but it came from his curiosity and not me preaching at him – 10 years, and God answered my prayer. So know that God does answer prayers. It may not be in the time you want, it may not be quite the answer you want, but God is always listening, and He will answer you.

Living With A Car SalesMan

So, as many of you know, my grandfather was a car salesman. You think I would be used to the hours one works. But I don’t think I was quite as prepared as I should have been.

My husband has been a car salesman for almost 2 months now. And I’ve learned a few things along the way.

#1: Your working hours are not your set working hours. If you have a potential customer come 1/2 hour before your shift is over, you can be there up to another 3 hours just to possibly sell them a car. Sometimes, you will be working 13 hour shifts unplanned. Your scheduled hours in no way dictate your actual hours.

#2: There are ways to avoid extra hours, but that may include having a lower income. Car salesman get a commission off of the vehicles they sell. However, if you don’t complete the whole sale, delivery, etc.. by yourself, you have to split your earnings with the other salesman who helps you. Even if that simply means handing over the keys when they officially come to pick it up. The smallest thing can cause half of your money being given to someone else, so yes, you’ll want those extra hours to make sure you receive the whole income.

#3: Your working days are not your set working days. And even so, the days are extensive. Just like you can be working extra hours, you can also be called in extra days. However, even going by the scheduled days, my husband averages 4 days off a month… essentially 1 day a week! That’s not much for time off at all. People in the oilfields get more time off than that.

I don’t regret my husband being a car salesman. He really enjoys it. In fact, today he is starting at Dodge where I knew he should have been all along. He loves Dodge, has only ever owned Dodge trucks and a Jeep (with the exception of the Audi we owned once). I think he’s where he’s meant to be.

But with things you love often comes sacrifice. And unfortunately for us, it’s some time. But hey, that gives me more time to clean, work, and blog… right?

Why the Name “Christian” Can Cause Such Anger

I’ve delayed in writing this blog post. The past few days have been a whirlwind for me. Not because I’m cleaning up my classroom, preparing for a new grade, but because the world has changed ever so quickly, and I needed to make sure my own emotions were not mixing and leading my thoughts but that rather my beliefs were the driving force behind my words.

When I decided I wanted to turn vegan, I thought what better place to learn than to join vegan groups on Facebook where people are continuously discussing ways of doing things better and on improving lifestyles. What better place would you get a mix of people who are starting out in their vegan adventure, as well as though who are tried and true veterans to the lifestyle. I did enjoy these facts, but I wasn’t prepared for what was coming.

As many of you know (and if you didn’t, I don’t know how you could have missed it), but the states have just legalized same sex marriage. To some people it’s no surprise, to some people it’s a reason to lash out, and to some people it’s a reason to celebrate. I was prepared for those reactions. What I wasn’t prepared for was the anger backing people’s responses. And it took a few days for me to truly understand what was going on.

Unfortunately, one of my vegan groups posted about this legalization and stated that you will never find a “homophobe vegan”. A man simply stated (though not in words I would have used) that he was not a “phobe” by the meaning of the word “phobia” as in being scared. He simply was using Biblical pieces to back-up the point that he did not support the movement. The backlash he received was incredible. And as I noticed he was the only one defending his beliefs, I decided to try and approach the conversation in a loving but understanding way. You see, I’ve noticed people are very quick to criticize Christian beliefs as being old and not modern day. But I knew that this is often because Christians have made a bad name for themselves.

I once saw a conversation where Christians were attacking an atheist. I could see where her comments and attacks were coming from. I couldn’t stand Christians reacting in this kind of way so I entered the conversation as well and simply responded to her questions and comments in a loving, non-judgemental way. It took quite awhile, but believe it or not, she thanked me for talking to her the way I did and explaining things the way I had. Of course she assured me she wouldn’t become Christian anytime soon, but that wasn’t the point of my discussion. The basis of my discussion was love.

So I figured that maybe if love was presented the right way in this vegan conversation, then maybe the hatred I was seeing would dissipate and the group could go back to the original purpose of becoming vegan and standing for animal rights. However, I’m sad to say it did not work that way. No matter how many times I reassured that none of the Christians in the conversation weren’t hating them nor judging them (all 2 of us), they served critique after critique back. No matter how many times I assured them that Christians should be focused on loving and loving all people, hate was served back. No matter how much love I tried to show about loving people but not supporting decisions they make, I was not supported. I even told them that the God of the world, Himself, has given us the power to choose what we do, regardless if we choose sin or not, and thus everyone in the world should have the power to choose what they want without anybody telling them otherwise, I was still considered judgemental. I brought up how I have a great uncle who has been a married gay my whole life and how I love him dearly and will never treat him otherwise, but that I do not support his lifestyle, I was still considered a “homophobe”. I was called a jerk, ingenious, told to take a nap, told I have mental sickness, that somehow someone loved me but in the same sentence told me everything I am is a sin, that God was going to send me to hell to burn for eternity, etc. And I was reminded again and again how listening to a 2000 year old book is so wrong.

I was not prepared for the hardness of hearts I was presented with. This is why I did not write this blog when I first thought of it. In fact, it’s been sitting as a tab for the past however many days since the law was passed. I’ve changed the name 3 times. I needed time to sort through what was going on, and to make sure my emotions were in check. And now I think I’m ready to help explain where I think things have gone wrong.

There happens to be a girl many years younger than I who was feeling the same way I was – being attacked by so many people, being pushed with no rest, exhausted from having to defend herself. The message came clearly in her Facebook post and the response from someone questioning the selection of beliefs, specifically pertaining to the lack of support on the same sex marriage issue.

I really thought about it before I posted this time, and I provided a very prominent issue among different Christians about the “clean” and “unclean” foods. I stated it as the fact that many Christians don’t support eating pork. Some claim that because it is an Old Testament law, that we no longer have to follow that distinction. Although many Christians disagree on this issue, we don’t hate our own family members just because they eat differently than ourselves. The best way to influence anyone in a positive way is through a loving manner. I also added that I grew up as a hunter’s daughter. When I turned vegetarian, my grandfather was convinced I would die. In fact, for the almost 10 years I was vegetarian, the very first question he would ask me is if I was healthy and had gone back to eating meat yet. The amount he would try to sneak meat onto my plate was crazy. He did not support my eating habits whatsoever. But he never stopped loving me. In fact, I can’t recall a day in my life where I did not feel loved by my grandfather, and that’s the way it should be.

To go a little further than that, she said she was going to put it bluntly and ask how same sex relationships is one law we believe from the Old Testament, but there were a host of others such as wearing jewelry, having tattoos, and premarital sex were things most Christians don’t follow anymore, yet we can choose to not stand for the same sex marriage issue.

This is where it truly sank in. The reason I believe that most people are so angry with Christians and our beliefs is because we have compromised on so much! Seriously, look around at your churches. I know for a fact that people drink, do drugs, party, have non-marrital sex with people regardless of being married or not, have problems with pornography, steal, cheat people out of money, etc, etc… There are people in almost every church who are the kings and queens of gossip. Churches are seen as judgemental because they’ve become that way. What have we done to ourselves?

Now, I’m not saying that all churches or even all people are this way. I do believe we have the sweetest, loving Christians still on this earth, and unfortunately that’s something we desperately need more of. But when Christians in themselves are out in the world claiming to be Christian and yet are caught in such horrible acts, what else is the world to think of us? Can you really blame people for hosting anger when they grew up in a church but like my sister, left because people were judging the clothing she wore? Do you really think that made her feel at home rather than winning her over with love? Personally, I’m ashamed at some of the things we’ve done to people. We should be opening our doors and welcoming, not just greeting, but truly welcoming people into our midst with the goal of letting love take over. When Jesus saved the prostitute, or sat with the tax collectors, you don’t see Him attacking them. He loved them and that’s what created the difference. Why can’t we do the same?

Of course I’m not saying we should kick out all of the people who are having problems either. What better place to receive help with healing than a church family, as long as we are being just that – a loving and supportive family.

Now, I know my beliefs may differ from yours, and that’s ok. Like I said, I have no judgement. The Bible, unfortunately, is not the most easily understood book at times, and some is left to our interpretation though hopefully somewhat unfolded with divine help (always pray before reading the Bible!). So yes, topics like jewelry and tattoos are a little more difficult to defend for some. However, I know the Bible clearly points out that our bodies are the living temples for the Holy Spirit, and we are to take care of them to the best of our abilities. Putting needles unnecessarily into my body, causing a stain that God did not put there in the first place that is ridiculous to remove, and putting holes all over my body does not seem like preserving the “holy temple” as God stated it. To me, that is clear enough definition as to why those are not the best idea. Jewelry that does not require holes (such as necklaces, rings, and bracelets) are a little more in the grey area. However, if you look at history, you will see that only the rich, and those who placed themselves above others wore jewelry. So at the time, it made total sense that jewelry was a way to separate the classes of people, and as far as I’ve read in my Bible, God doesn’t view us that way, nor does He want us to develop an attitude of being better than others. So to me, that makes sense. When it comes to premarital sex, it’s a no-brainer to me. You don’t need a Bible to tell you it’s not the best idea. Look up science reports and the reactions in the brain with sex. Look up psychology reports. The more sex you have before marriage, the less you are bringing to your marriage. Imagine if everything was brand new coming into your marriage. No past relationships to discuss, no past comparisons to make, nothing bad to bring into your forever relationship. I think in a way, we’ve lost sight of how sacred and special marriage was supposed to be. It was a union, a joining of two people. And in Mark 10:9, it states clearly, “Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.” We say vows, vows that are actually supposed to mean something. God blessed the union between husband and wife and specifically said that NO MAN (that means nobody on this earth) should be able to separate that union. I don’t know about you, but there are an awful lot of divorces going on. A lot of “man” separating what God told us not to. And that’s in the New Testament, not even the old.

Again, I hope you are not taking offence to this. I am the product of a divorced family who married other divorced people. Divorce is around me, and although I love my family more dearly than anything, I will fight with all I have to preserve my marriage union because I believe that is what is right. (I may continue this conversation at another time. It’s a whole separate Bible study.)

So those are my thoughts. I’m not sure if Christians will ever recover. If we’re going to stand for our beliefs, we need to learn not to compromise. No, it’s not easy being criticized. If anything, becoming vegan has opened my eyes to a whole new way of being criticized (not enough protein, not losing weight fast enough, not going to be healthy, etc…). But if you truly believe in something and seek to receive the rewards at the end, then you need to stand for whatever it is. But remember to stand in a loving way. Hate is fuel to the fire, but love (usually) softens the hardest of hearts. So speak to and treat each other in love, regardless of what a person chooses, but stay strong to yourself and don’t compromise on the beliefs you hold. Nobody in this world has the right to force their beliefs on people. But rather, keep an open ear and seek to find the Truth, and once you have the Truth, hold on to it. As humans, we are master justifiers, master liars, and master convincers. Don’t let someone talk you out of being yourself and believing what you’ve sought to be true.

For another pastor’s perspective, I found this to be a good, well-written, loving read with Biblical back-up.
http://todaychristian.net/a-detailed-explanation-of-why-christians-dont-accept-gay-marriage/