I Wonder If I Argue Too Much…

Sometimes I take a minute to sit back and reflect over what I do, whether it’s the direction my life is going in, or the way I handled a situation.

Recently, I’ve started thinking about my part in online discussions or arguments. In the past, I was the child who never spoke out. It was so bad, I would even have my younger sister go to the counter of a restaurant to get something they forgot to give me (even something as small as ketchup!).

When I first became (seriously) Christian, it was the same way. I was too scared that I didn’t know enough to speak out, or that I would be ridiculed because of information I didn’t have the answer to.

When I became vegan, it was the same thing. I didn’t feel I knew enough to speak out because I wasn’t the most “educated” or didn’t know “all the right answers”.

But as I continued to watch everyone else, I realized that you will never know everything. And besides, the best argument you have is your personal testimony, no matter whether it’s veganism, Christianity, or anything else. Nobody can argue what you’ve experienced. They can only argue facts and somehow even opinions (though I think everyone should be allowed an opinion).

The very first argument I ever felt brave enough to enter was between an atheist and a Christian. I couldn’t stand the picture of Christianity that the Christians were displaying that I felt compelled to go in and clear up the awful view. No, I was not trying to convert the atheist, I simply was explaining things she clearly had questions about and had been given a bad taste and picture of previously. By the end of the hour+ long conversation, she actually thanked me, and though she said she would not be considering becoming Christian at the time, she thanked me for being so understanding and being patient with my answers while explaining things in a different light than she had previously been shown.

To me, that should be the point of an argument or discussion. It shouldn’t be to fight or to prove one side better than the other. Of course I believe Christianity is the way, but I’m not going to force it down other peoples’ throats. God gave me my freedom of choice, so who am I to take it away from others? I can only present information and leave it up to them.

The next argument I ever went in on was not the same way. In fact, I got told to go take a nap along with being called many names. My whole point in that argument was that you can love people without supporting their actions. For example, you can love your child without supporting their drug use. You can support them for the good things, show them outwardly love, and even include them in normal things. But when an action they are doing goes against your beliefs or causes harm to either them or others, you don’t have to support that action. In no way does that mean you stop loving that person. But the group, or at least some people in that group, couldn’t accept that. I don’t know if I didn’t explain myself well enough, but I was in that conversation for several hours. It came to the point that I understood Christians were not going to be supported in that vegan group, and I respectfully excused myself from the group.

I don’t intervene in everything I see on the internet that I disagree with, but when it comes to things that harm others, when it comes to peoples’ health, or when it comes to slandering Christians, I try to go in and paint a different picture. Some people are accepting, some people will never be kind no matter what you say. I’ve been called a heap of names and been criticized against sometimes it seems like anything I say. Even when I’m remaining as polite as I can and stating again and again that nobody has to believe the same as I do, and that I will respect what they believe just as I would expect them to respect what I believe. It is possible to live in harmony without believing the same things (just look at the conversation with the atheist and I). But for some reason, I’m finding more and more people who cannot leave it that way.

I had a fellow Christian follow one of these conversations and eventually tell me that I should just end my conversation because the others (the main of which was apparently Hindu) was just going to keep coming up with every slandering thing and continue saying the worst possible portraits of Christianity they could. I just found it so sad. Sad that first of all, someone had views like that of what can be the most amazing faith. I know a lot of Christians call themselves Christian while living a very different life. Sad that also, someone who was a self-proclaimed “vegan” that is supposed to be filled with so much love could be so hateful towards Christians who honestly had done nothing wrong in this conversation but speak of the original diet in the Garden of Eden (vegan diet!). But as the other Christian woman suggested, I quit responding, despite the fact I continued to get blamed for things and called names in further comments.

I think about that conversation, and I continue to think of how I could have done it differently, what I might have done wrong. But the thing is, in every comment, I approached it in a very much “my experience was…” manner. I didn’t say that her beliefs were wrong, and I never discriminated against her, even telling her that I would continue to respect her and her choices. I don’t really want to continue the conversation, and I won’t, even though it’s hard to know that my name has been continued on in the conversation very negatively. I just don’t get it.

It makes me think… is there a point to me joining in these conversations? Is there a point when I’m just going to be downgraded and slandered by so many people? But then I also think of the vegan community who promotes standing up for those who are voiceless. I do think if you’re passionate about something, you shouldn’t just remain quiet about it, whether through actions or words. So do I just hold back my passion now that I finally feel brave to stand up for people? I mean, Christians in some of these groups literally get POUNDED into the ground by others, called every name in the book, their faith literally ridiculed up and down. I guess I feel like just by saying something (though again, not in a forceful way, often in a soft, from experience type of way) that they at least know someone is in their corner with them. I’m not afraid of being Christian. I’m not afraid of being vegan. I’m not ashamed of the things I believe. So if I get called names, it really doesn’t bother me. I don’t get as “heated” about these things as clearly others do. Temper control is not an issue for me in these conversations and part of me wonders if that’s what makes some people so mad. I don’t swear, I don’t believe in calling people names, I’m not that kind of person.

I don’t know… is it worth it or is it not? I guess I have just come to a place in my life where I’m content… maybe even more than content. For non-Christians, I know they won’t understand this, but for Christians who have experienced God saving their lives, they will know what I’m talking about. I can honestly say I’m filled with the joy of the LORD which makes everything surmountable. Months when we have less income, I don’t freak out anymore, because when I had no idea how we were going to survive before, God provided the money. I’ve totalled 2 cars, one that I in no way should have walked away from, but God protected me. I used to be so scared to face my mistakes and of punishments I may receive, but through God I know I have the strength to face whatever comes my way. I use to be so OCD about making sure everything was a certain way, but now I’m ok if things change. Even at work, when a wrench gets thrown in my plans, I don’t care. I’ve learned that nothing can be set in stone, but whatever may happen, God always provides. There is honestly little that upsets me. And why wouldn’t I want others to know that same feeling? Can you imagine a world where there was no stress, no worry, no panic? Can you imagine how much happier everyone would be? Can you imagine the amount of stress-induced illnesses that could be prevented? How can people not want a life like that?

Again, I’m not trying to force my lifestyle and faith down peoples’ throats. I always approach it in a way that I can share my experience and they can make their own choices past that. If that’s so wrong, then I don’t know how any conversation can take place. So I don’t know… what do you guys think? Is it worth the interjection in hopes that two fighting groups can maybe be a little more understanding and live in harmony? Or is it just a waste of energy? Maybe I try to play the “peacemaker” a little too much… I don’t know. Tell me what you think in the comments below.

I Said “No” to Cheese!

I thought this day would never come. I have been so addicted to cheese my whole life! I grew up in a Quebecois family, so those lovely Quebec cheese curds that make a world of difference in a true Quebec poutine? Ate them out of the bag as a snack! In fact, my dad, once my parents divorced, would take out the block of cheese, break off a piece for each of us, and that’s what we would eat.

I was vegetarian for almost 10 years. I thought a few times about trying veganism. But I never could do it, simply because I was so addicted to cheese. I could give up yogurt, milk, even ice cream! But I could not give up cheese. I swear it was running through my veins. The only cheese I probably never was interested in was the varieties of blue cheeses. I can never seem to justify eating something that is mouldy. Yuck.

After doing some research this year, it all made sense! Cheese literally can be an addiction. Other dairy products fail in comparison to how densely packed cheese is with different parts of nutrition. I believe it was casein that was pointed out specifically. Because of the concentration, it literally leaves us wanting more. It’s not just the flavour, there is an actual addictive side to the chemical mix of our bodies and the ingredients of cheese. How interesting is that! I literally was addicted to cheese!

Even with my first few days of going vegan, I fell with cheese. Like I said, everything else is avoidable, but cheese. When I had my burrito for supper last night, it would have been so easy to just throw on the cheese. It was readily shredded and available. But I said NO! Wow… I can’t even tell you how empowering that felt. And then my husband and I went to the theatre for the first time in forever last night. I LOVE peanut butter Reese’s and even the new peanut butter M&Ms, but I said NO. I can’t believe it. Who am I? Who is this woman that could never give up this stuff before. I like her! She’s empowered!

I’m feeling awesome. And even this morning, when I just wanted to grab some salt and vinegar cracker chips because they were easy to grab, I said NO and went to work. I’m now drinking my orange juice (another 2.63L) and I know I’m feeling a ton better than I would have otherwise.

I love this lifestyle. I’ve finally got it! Not that I don’t think there won’t be struggles (I haven’t tried going to a function or travelling while being 100% yet), but I’m up and ready. My foot has been stomped. I’ve beat the greatest temptation of all! I’m so excited!

The Penalty of Standing Out

I hate the way the world works sometimes. I hate seeing people in pain. I hate watching people getting picked on or bullied. I hate sin and wrong-doings in this world.

When I was going through my university years, completing my education degree, I had a desire to work with special needs children. It wasn’t because I looked forward to the extra work that often comes with special needs children, but because I wanted to make a difference. I knew special needs children were often put down and sometimes stared at as if the were a circus sideshow. I knew I could step up and be the voice of those children, and I knew that I could help those children feel as important as they are. But that’s not what happened.

At first I ended up teaching at a Native School. It took me awhile to learn the different dynamics needed to teach students who come from a history of anger. It was a definite learning curve in understanding the culture, the behaviours, and the thoughts about different things. But one of the things I found is that my classroom was often their safe place. My classroom was the one place they could count on someone being there to love them. I was a safe place for these kids.

Now as much as I loved being in that position, time would have me change again. This time, to a place where I wasn’t such a safe place. These kids did not need me (or at least felt like they didn’t). The attitudes were indifferent, the gratitude was gone. I really struggled at first to see how in the world I could make a difference when my students were convinced they had everything the needed.

Unfortunately, it wasn’t my first year that I figured it out. It was my second and my third that really opened my heart. I realized that maybe I wouldn’t be able to reach all students, even though I try. But there is at least one in each class who needs someone they can trust; someone they can break down their barriers and let them truly see the inside that they keep.

It broke my heart when the first student really let me in their life. The amount of background some of these kids hide is disheartening. It sometimes makes you wonder how they even function. It’s no wonder some of them put up a tough-front at school. Some of them are simply caught in that worldly struggle: the one where they are fighting between being good and doing what they know is right, and doing what the world expects and wants them to do. Absolutely the struggle gets worse as the generations get older. It’s sad in the very least, but it does, unfortunately, exist.

I witnessed something that brought this whole thing up in my mind. A situation that brought up a whole slew of memories.

One of my students is running for class rep in the upcoming school year. She’s an awesome student, wonderful in both academics and her Christianity. Unfortunately, she is one in very few that does not struggle with desires to be popular. She will not swear because others are doing it. She does not talk about inappropriate things because she has no interest. She knows what she believes and she sticks to it. She knows what is right, and that is what she does. And it has made her unpopular in her class.

Today, the vote was completed. And though she almost perfectly fits the description of the position she is running for, more votes were left blank than were voted in favour. My heart sank and my blood boiled a little. If there were legitimately good reasons for not letting her have the position, then I would accept that. But I know it’s because they are upset the one person they wanted to run wasn’t able due to his grades. Whether it’s an expression of bitterness or anger, is it right to decline someone that not only wants the position, but is ready, willing and capable of doing it well?

I don’t know what the right solution is. After all, voting is an expression of your opinion. But my heart aches in knowing that the reasons behind the reactions are wrong. And that bothers me. Someone who perfectly is capable of doing something so well, being held back by unpopularity, is wrong. It takes me right back to my whole philosophy of teaching, and that is that students are capable of more than they are doing, and standing up for those who don’t have as much of a voice.

I grew up in public schools where situations are much worse than I have ever experienced in my years of private school. I have seen “losers” beat up for simply not being good enough for others. I have seen the separation and isolation of those who needed the extra pull-out help and did not think like the others. I have seen students dragged from classrooms because they were acting out in anger about their situations. It’s not pretty.

One year, we did a fundraiser where the boys provided a lunch, and we bid on these “anonymous lunches”. When the bidding was done and every girl had her lunch, then the boys would reveal themselves and we would share lunch with them. I just happened to get one of those classmates that was always taken out for extra help, and who had problems with his anger, reacting from the situations he was in and the way he was treated.

I will forever regret the way I treated him.

I didn’t say anything mean, but that’s simply because I didn’t say anything at all. I was silent the whole time. And now I cannot even go back and apologize for being “snobby” because he was killed in a car accident several years ago (I think I was still in high school). That’s guilt that I have to live with, and guilt that started to change the way I reacted to people.

The one girl that was dragged from our classroom was probably the lowest person in our class. She didn’t always take showers, and she didn’t come from the most well-off family. In fact, I actually don’t know how she was treated at home. But what I do know is that people didn’t like her and daily made fun of her. I will never forget the one day she came up to me and told me that I was her role-model. I didn’t try to be anyone’s role-model, I just tried to talk to her and be nice when others wouldn’t. And look at the difference that made on her life. The simplest of acts I could have done, and it literally changed her world.

Now I’d like to say others followed, but they didn’t. I’d like to say her life changed for the best, but it didn’t. I did manage to get in contact with her again during university, sadly to find out she was pregnant and the baby’s father wanted nothing to do with her as soon as she became pregnant. As a matter of fact, he ran out with another girl and married her very shortly afterwards. And to make matters worse, he called social services claiming she was an unfit mother and had her baby taken away. In no way did her life get better.

I’m sad to say I’ve lost contact with her. My only method of contact no longer seems to work. I do pray for her, that things work out and she’s able to have her baby back in her life. I know she was fighting hard for him. But I pray God’s love surrounds her and God-willing, I will be able to connect with her again.

I truly, truly do hate the world treats people that are different – people that stand out from everybody else. I had the position of popularity and I misused it once. But I promise to do my best to never misuse it again. When a situation arises where someone needs a voice, I wish to be that voice for them, to stand up on their behalf. Just because you don’t think the same as everyone else or do the same things everyone else does is not a reason to be treated so badly. Stand up for those who can’t stand up for themselves. Make a difference in someone’s life. Even if it’s just one person you’ve helped, you’ve literally just changed a person’s entire world. Do what you can and don’t delay. You never know the good you can leave behind.

Day 1 in Review

Hello everyone!

As promised, I will tell you what my days are like, and what I may struggle with.

I have gotten quite a few ideas from different vegans, however, today I decided to go with Freelee’s sample meal plan in a way that I could do it.

For breakfast, I’m having pulpy orange juice. That way I’m still getting in some of the fibre, and filling up on some yummy oranges. She suggests drinking 2L just for breakfast! I would have loved this as a kid, and still enjoy it today! I don’t think this is something I will do everyday, simply because I know it is important to get the full fibre in of a full fruit, but every once in awhile, it’s a nice, healthy “treat”!

For supplements with my breakfast (I’ll quit taking them as soon as I run out though…), I’m taking 2 probiotics (to make sure my digestion doesn’t do anything funny on the switch in diet), biotin (for hair and nail growth), and vitamin D (it just snowed again today!). I am planning on taking vitamin D still on days that I don’t get outside in the sun much, and also planning on taking B12 which apparently is difficult to get enough of on many different diets, not just vegan. Aside from those two, I will not continue the others once I am done with them, unless I need to. I also took two green chews (using to help me adjust until I’m eating a sufficient amount of greens each day), and some multivitamins (which I will also stop taking once they are done).

For a snack, I again took Freelee’s suggestion and drank some more pulpy orange juice. Like I said, it’s amazing! But I don’t think I would do this more than once or twice a week. It’s good to get a variety of fruits and veggies in too!

In total, I drank approximately 2.63L of pulpy orange juice. I did not even feel hungry at lunch! I’m in love.

Now, I was little worried that because I was drinking so much orange juice, and no water, that my urine would show up as dehydrated (darker yellow). After all, as a kid, you grow up thinking this is the case, usually because it’s not pure orange juice you were drinking. But nope! It was really clear. I was very hydrated! That’s the power of real things (no additives).

I got really busy at work (teaching, of course), and did not get a chance to eat anything else throughout the afternoon. I thought I had a deadline for certain files to be in my students’ records. Although I was done getting them to do their part, I wanted to grade them quickly before I sent them to their files. So I was grading like a mad-woman! When I was done with one stack, and about to tackle the next (after school), I took the one stack to our special needs coordinator. She was so excited I was done with them and was the first one. I looked at her and asked her why I was the first one when the deadline was tomorrow. She then proceeded to tell me the deadline was a week from tomorrow. I had the date completely wrong! Ugh… Oh well, I’d rather have things done earlier than later. I didn’t mark the second stack though. I went home.

I was so hungry when I came home, and so excited at the same time. I had just subscribed to a service called The Organic Box. They deliver fresh, organic produce to you once a week. You’re able to customize that you want, and it’s just amazing. So I got my first box today, and was so excited as I brought it in the house and was taking everything out. In fact, it inspired my supper.

For supper, I had a big salad with 50/50 mixed greens from Organic Girl, berries from my Organic Box (blackberries, blueberries, raspberries, strawberries), rainbow carrots from my Organic Box, field cucumber from my Organic Box, some sunflower seeds and soya nuts that I had, and topped with a mixture I made of avocado, salsa, lemon and a touch of vegan cream cheese. Oh it was so delicious and fresh tasting. Absolutely loved it!

Unplanned, but when we got to the gym, they have a Booster Juice and my husband wanted one of their smoothies. They have these vegetarian wraps that are super tasty, so I got one of those. I’m not sure this was vegan… That was my mistake. I will have to check another time.

My workout went well. I did a 10 minute warm-up on the treadmill, did some push-ups, some kettebell and 10-lb plate squats (hold the plate straight out in front of you), planks, foam rolling, shoulder rolls, standing alternating toe touches, my chiropractor exercises, and a 20 minute brisk walk on the treadmill.

Usually when I do cardio, I take it as my chance to read. I’ve conquered quite a few books this way because I have so much going on the rest of the time. Right now, I’m reading a book called “Skinny B***h”. I don’t swear, ever, so I will not type it out, sorry. But it is a super good book so far (minus some swearing/harsh language), but the information is awesome. The two ladies that wrote it are actually vegan and they explain why they’ve made this choice and why people should make that choice throughout the first chapters of the book. Love it.

After we came home, I took some mini, organic sweet potatoes that I had and cooked them up. One had gone mouldy in the bag, but didn’t seem to effect the others. I was so deceived. I cooked up about four of them, took them out of the peel and mashed them together, had a couple good bites, then took a bite that was potently terrible. In fact I had to spit it back out, clean my mouth out, gargle and the works. Oh that was so terrible. I didn’t go on eating anything more last night. That had ruined my appetite.

Following this, I went to bed.