The Write-Off Day – Healing Journey Day 23

Journal:
So, today was a planned write-off. Yes, I planned it as a write-off. Now that the day is over, am I regretting it? Yes, actually I am. I feel like I just started cleansing the little bit of cooked food out of my system thoroughly with my banana day and my juice day, and I’ve filled myself with stuff that may stuff-up my digestion all over again. And since today was a planned write-off day, I made a few mistakes that I will explain.

This morning, I had to get up at 6:00 am to get a shower and get ready to leave. I received four pears in my latest Organic Box that looked ready to go. So I figured they would be an easy breakfast to eat quickly. However, I don’t think they were ripe enough because the one pear that I did eat was not good. So I only managed to eat half before throwing it out. That did not work. I did manage to pack some red grapes and a plum for the drive, but between being tired and talking, I only managed to eat about a cup of grapes before arriving for our day-long meeting.

So why didn’t I just take juice with me on this day? Well, being that the meeting was in a church, I didn’t feel right taking a large bottle of juice in with me. That being said, I only have one small water bottle to take with me and that would not last me the day. Yes, I could have left juice in the car, but if it was hot, the juice could have gone bad. And not just that, I didn’t take my own car as I carpooled with someone else so I would have had to bother them for the keys each time I needed to refill my bottle. So that is why I allowed myself a write-off day. Again, if I could go back, I would have put in the extra effort to take the juice, but we live and learn… right? I’m making these mistakes for you so you can learn from me. That’s the whole purpose of sharing this journey with you.

So during the meeting, I started getting hungry. They had given us a new bottle of water, but I didn’t eat enough in the morning to concentrate for four hours until lunch. So I dug around in my bag and found a crunchy peanut Clif bar. Was it good? It was alright. It actually was probably just like I remembered them: good but with a zing that is not my completely favourite part. However, it held me over until lunch.

For lunch, they had a catering company come in. I actually have had the food from this company before during one of our conference-wide teacher’s meetings. I had bean sprout salad, tomatoes, cauliflower, broccoli, rice-filled cabbage rolls, corn, steamed veggies, sautéed veggies (could have done without this one), a whole-grain bun and some vegan meatballs in a sweet and sour sauce. There were no vegan desserts, so I did not indulge in that. I mean, the food was an awesome break from the sweetness of juices. It was definitely a savoury meal. BUT I lost interest about halfway through the meal and wished I had my juice. Man, it’s so weird learning how my body has changed. It really is. I was not tempted whatsoever by the non-vegan items there (again, they don’t serve meat but a lot are vegetarian so dairy is an issue). And even though I’ve been wanting savoury things for such a long time, a little goes a long way.

Following lunch, we had another four and a half hours of meeting. Thankfully, I got a lot of work done while the meeting was going on as I had brought work with me. So really, it was not a total waste of a day. I at least was being productive! Naturally, I was not hungry whatsoever as this food was heavy in my stomach. I didn’t even finish the plate… I honestly couldn’t. I can’t eat what I used to!

When the meeting was finally over, we headed over to what used to be the ABC store. They recently changed the name of it and I honestly can’t remember what it is! But either way, they sell all kinds of vegan and vegetarian food items as well as books and all kinds of music and kid’s things. It’s one of my favourite stores. Since we didn’t have a lot of time and I was also catching up with a friend in the store, I grabbed a quick treat of vegan jerky for the trip home. Now this is something I shouldn’t have done. I didn’t really need it. This is when I discovered that old habits die hard! Even when I have a “write-off” day, I need to remember that just because I can have something doesn’t mean I have to. It’s better not to stuff yourself with junk that you will regret later. Really decide if it’s worth it instead of just doing it. Again, learn from me.

We didn’t get home until 7:00 pm. It truly was a late day. In my e-mail, a few days ago, I received a coupon for a free 6″ sub at Subway. So I decided that I would get supper from there. I had a 6″ veggie sub with almost all the veggies, a bit of mustard and some sweet onion sauce. I know it may sound weird, but it’s actually good. It was much lighter than lunch so it sat a little better in my stomach. Still, I’m looking forward to my juice day tomorrow. How weird is that?

The weird thing about coming home after Subway though was my spurt of energy. I just had so much energy that I went out to my stairs and did 2 sets of 10 step ups for each leg on them. Random energy bursts to exercise? I support this! And I wasn’t even done yet…

I went and sat down for a few minutes, but decided I still had some more energy to go. So I put on some good music and did a “Fight Club Workout”. It went something like this:
1. Warm-up: 5 minutes of a basic left and right punch
2. 12 Lunges with Front Kicks (each side)
3. 1 minute of the warm-up
4. 12 Turn, Block, and Punches (each arm)
5. 1 minute of the warm-up
6. 12 Head Crushers (each side)
7. 1 minute of the warm-up
8. 12 Push-Ups (on my knees)
9. 1 minute of the warm-up
Repeat circuit one more time.

Man, it was such a fun workout. I was a bit worried as I heard quite a bit of “snapping” as I threw punches (I’ve had absolutely no training in this area) but I don’t think I injured myself so it’s all good!

After the fun workout, I made a mango smoothie. Oh my goodness! I wasn’t going to take a picture today because I try not to encourage eating the food that shouldn’t be eating yet (aka I should be on juices and thus should only show juice pictures) but these mangoes were DELICIOUS! I bought these 14 mangoes about a week ago and they were hard as a rock. Only 4 of them have softened so I’m still waiting for the others. But these 4 were so good and made such a delicious drink. Now these I could eat all day. I’m really beginning to think that if I had properly ripened fruit in the right seasons, this journey would be going a lot better than it is. But we do the best with what we got! I mean, do you see the colour of this thing? So good…

After drinking my super satisfying smoothie, I got ready for bed. It has been a long but good day. I’m hoping this will be the start of a slightly easier work week!

Review of Symptoms:
-Acne is the same.
-Digestion on hold… again…
-Heavier stomach feeling from eating so much.
-Thick saliva again.
-Hair is so-so greasy feeling today. Still a little better than normal.
-Energy was awesome today.
-Very productive.

Weight at the end of the day = 182.6 lbs (up 8 lbs from yesterday! Woah!)

Total Calories = approx. 2560 (56% carbs, 21% fat, 23% protein… I ate a lot today! I’m actually surprised the macro split isn’t worse than this!)

Day 12 – An Unplanned Write-Off

This morning I woke up so dehydrated! So right away, knowing I caused damage last night, I drank some water.

But problems started right at breakfast. I actually tried to sit down and eat this red papaya I had. I noticed it smelled a little funny when I cut it open, but went on to eat it anyways. The very first bite, I spit out within two seconds. I don’t know what happened to this papaya, so of course I went looking for something else. I didn’t really feel like eating after the awfulness of last night, but of course, I want that stuff out of my house, then rationalized that I couldn’t waste all that money, so I finished last night’s leftovers. Awful, terrible, don’t even want to talk about it. The biggest key to success is to not even bring it in the house. I’ve gotta learn!

At the gym, I went for a gruelling 35 minute stationary bike ride. I kept raising the difficulty every two minutes and it took so much work. I was so happy when I was finally finished the last 10 minutes. I was beginning to think I should lower the level, but I managed to stick it out! I was so thirsty and drank a ton of water when I was done. But I was happy.

I finished my workout with some lunge stretches, walking high kicks, and my chiropractor’s exercises. It felt good to get things done in the morning for sure.

I don’t even want to speak about my lunch, but to be accountable, I must. Remember those brownies from last night? Well, let’s just say they got finished, topped with some vegan coconut milk yogurt. I should have just eaten the yogurt, but I can officially say all the junk is out of my house again. I just feel awful and need to get to the point of throwing stuff out rather than risking my health, and not ordering it in the first place. It’s back on the proper mental train.

Or… let’s just add fuel to the fire. My husband and I eventually got ready and headed into town. We’re due for our weekly groceries, and he had no food to really eat left. So we stopped to get him food. Instead of not getting anything like I should have, I did make a vegan decision, but a bad decision as far as eating when I wasn’t hungry. I had a green onion cake, and I would have been just fine if I hadn’t had it. Ugh… The moral of all of this is just stop. Just don’t indulge in things you KNOW are going to make you feel awful. It starts a huge train wreck that you have to try and reset yourself from. Learn from my terrible, bloating, sick-feeling, stomach-turning mistakes. I have not done my job in taking care of my body.

So, I’d like to say the rest of the day finally went better. To some minor extent, it did. But honestly, I snacked on Veggie Chips, organic limeade, and that’s about it. I was going to make baked bananas, but found out I had forgotten I was out of tin foil.

Today was a bad day, and a prime example of why the avoidance of eating junk is so important. Because I ate so badly all day, I had huge cravings for candy tonight. That’s a sure sign that I did not eat enough fruit today (or any) and it’s just a wreck. I’m thinking of doing a completely raw couple of days to help flush out my system. Let’s see if I have the mental power to do it!

Day 10

This morning, I woke up at 5:30 sharp. What time was my alarm set for? 7:00. I have so much energy I can’t even finish sleeping in the morning! Seems a little strange…

So the first thing I did was drink a cup of water. Time to start getting the body hydrated!

For breakfast, I had an organic mini seedless watermelon. Almost halfway through the melon, I started wondering how I was even going to finish the thing. It was a beautiful red flesh, sweet flavour, and very little white flesh melon. So delicious. Somehow, I just kept eating and ate the whole thing!

I got ready, went to my chiropractor and acupuncture appointments, and then starting thinking those food thoughts again… I wanted so bad to stop and get sushi. Oh my goodness, it took the whole drive home for me to talk myself out of going. Not that it’s not vegan (cucumber rolls, avocado rolls, etc…), but it’s definitely not rawtill4 and I really don’t need to spend the extra money.

Somehow, I did it again! I beat my mind, came home, made a sandwich with Silver Hills Squirrely bread, an avocado, some lemon juice, cucumber, this raw ranch dip, and some salsa. I then had another fifth of my fresh mango cake with some vanilla coconut yogurt on top. Not the best raw meals, but it did stop me from spending extra money and it will tide me over for now.

For supper tonight, I’ve asked my husband to go to our stir fry place where I can get different fruits and veggies that I want, served with rice and noodles. I can’t believe I’m craving rice! I used to dread eating it. I have such a craving for it today!

After my husband came home, we got ready and went to our stir fry place. Oh, it was so good! I made a mix of carrots, bean sprouts, cauliflower, chick peas, tofu, mini corn-on-the-cob, pineapple, dried cranberries, peanuts, kale, noodles, and coconut rice. I use sweet and sour sauce and coconut milk as a topping. Oh it was so delicious. I even indulged and had a green onion cake. It was just so good and so filling! I couldn’t eat it all.

After we came home and let the food digest a little, we got ready and went to the gym. I did 30 minutes of treadmill cardio, followed by some variations of lunges, walking high kicks, stretches and the chiropractor exercises. It was a good energizing workout.

When I got home, I finished that fantastic stir fry. In fact, I wished I had more. Maybe next time I’ll make my stir fry bigger! 🙂

That was basically it for the day. I’m feeling good!

Day 8

Today was a different day. Today was a busy morning, getting my husband’s clothes ready for his new job that he’s currently stressed about (in school this week, doesn’t have a chance to start making money until next week), as well as making sure I had everything and was ready for my students’ PAT today.

I did not eat breakfast, and pretty much snacked on bananas, apples, Bolthouse Vanilla Chai (which is vegan!), apple juice, and other school-approved snacks that I had bought. I snacked pretty much for the first 5 hours of the day. Oh boy… not the best food, but not necessarily the worst.

Because my students missed their gym time and morning recess, I gave them a 45-minute recess after lunch. They were such troopers, and I was proud of them. After all, they were writing for 2-3 hours straight. It gave me an opportunity to not only get some fresh air, but also to soak up some good vitamin D!

When I came home, I was so happy to find my new Organic Box! It’s like opening a present every time to find these beautiful organic fruits and vegetables. This time, I also ordered some organic seaweed chips for my husband and I to try. They were DELISH! We ate the whole bag (my husband ate more than I did, but I still had a fair share!).

Before heading to the gym, I had two pieces of Silver Hills Squirrely bread with peanut butter and peach jam made with xylitol. I also had some rainbow carrots with a vegan ranch dip I also ordered in my Organic Box. The dip was ok, but I have to be honest when I say the rainbow carrots are not particularly my favourite. Maybe I’ve become so out-of-touch with the taste of real carrots again. We’ll see.

At the gym, I was on the treadmill for 30 minutes, then did some lunges, walking high kicks, some stretches, and my chiropractor exercises. I felt so good and energized the whole time.

When I came home, I took a look at those mangos I still have done nothing with (should have done something with them yesterday. They are really going to go bad soon!) So tonight, I took out the blender, cut all of the good flesh off of them, and pureed it with a little vanilla and macadamia oil. I then took out a bowl and mixed some flour with baking soda, cinnamon, and a pinch of salt. I then mixed the two together, put it in a shallow baking dish, and waited for my fresh mango cake to cook.

While I was waiting, for tonight’s supper (really need to fix my whole eating raw until 4, cooked after 4), I blended 4 bananas (also need to be used asap) with some unsweetened vanilla almond milk and 5 medjool dates.Talk about filling!