When “Pushiness” Goes Too Far…

I really dislike pushy people. This is part of the reason I hate car shopping. I don’t mind going to look at cars at night, and actually, that’s why my husband compromised and did with me this last time. I fear having a pushy salesman come out who only sees me as a dollar sign. I would rather take my time, make sure that I am putting my investment into a vehicle I actually like rather than making a rash decision and end up hating my vehicle.

Now, I’m not saying that all salesmen are pushy. My very first car purchase was wonderful. I don’t remember the guy being pushy at all, even after presenting him an odd situation. It was my first car, and I didn’t know how to drive a standard. I was terrified of test driving a vehicle, so my boyfriend (now husband) did the test driving with me while I was a passenger. The difference between standard and automatic was a world of difference and I knew I wanted a manual. However, I couldn’t drive it. But, I was determined to. So I bought the manual, and my future husband drove it home.

So many nights I spent on the back roads of town, conquering that first gear. Everything else seemed easy, but that first gear threw me for a few loops. Eventually, after a few stalls and squealing tires later, I fell all the more in love with my vehicle, seeing it as more of an extension of myself when driving. It couldn’t have been a better purchase from a very calm salesman who was ready to do what I needed but not ready to just push a vehicle on me, to a financial advisor who was up front and honest, even though he was profiting from selling me the vehicle. He told me right away that vehicles are the worst investment anybody could make because they deteriorate and are hardly ever worth what you pay. The honesty of this place was astounding and they will forever have my respect. The salesman even sent me a card later thanking me for my purchase and adding a P.S. of “Hope you’ve learned to drive your vehicle!” Those are the kind of people I like dealing with.

In my next car purchases, I’ve said no as soon as the salesman got pushy. I don’t live in the same place where I had bought my first vehicle or else I would have bought from there again.

So to avoid speaking about cars the whole time, I’m going to go through something I experienced a few weeks ago when I went to try a new gym.

I have a student who is interested in working out and has been asking me for a workout plan. So in order to help her, I decided I would go check out her gym to see what was available. I also planned on working out there that night since I was already going to be there instead of going to my own gym. It was a bit out of my way, but I didn’t mind doing it to help her.

I was more than prepared to pay for the session. However, I saw an ad that advertised a free gym trial. So I filled out the information, got a call, and arranged a time to come in. It required meeting a manager, getting a tour, filling out paperwork, etc. I also saw an ad with their ad that stated their gym fees were $15 biweekly. It was quite a bit cheaper than my own gym, so this kind of piqued my interest. I actually was interested in learning about these low fees, especially now that I’m here on my own and this is a female-only gym. I was open to the suggestions.

The whole walk-through, discussion, etc. went well. But it came down to the end when she began throwing membership papers in front of me that I politely told her that I am not comfortable with signing up that night. I explained to her that I wanted to check out the gym for myself, to experience what it is like being there in the atmosphere with the other members, with the equipment – to actually use it – and to really be part of the atmosphere. When it comes to a gym, this is crucial to me. I have been working out regularly for years, so I don’t want to put myself in a gym where I don’t feel “pushed” or as “free” to do what I want, especially if you don’t like some of the equipment or how it is set up, which you truly can only experience by doing your workout and feeling the flow of the design.

She did not take that explanation well. She immediately started asking me why I was changing my mind (which I hadn’t), why I possibly couldn’t want to change right away, then started asking what she had done wrong (this could have been a good self-assessment question had she not presented it the way she did), and wouldn’t even let me workout that day. I even explained to her that I wasn’t sure what I was doing this summer (two months away, my gym requires one month’s notice for cancellation) so I would have to discuss it with my husband. But the one thing that I will never forget, aside from her tone and change of discussion, was her face. She had been so smiley and happy to show me around the gym. But the minute I said I wasn’t prepared to sign papers that night, her whole countenance changed. I was given much more pressure, and even the cold shoulder towards the end. As I said, she wouldn’t even allow me to workout at the gym that night. She wrote me a card for a specific time the next day (not even a one day pass to go at my convenience) and made sure I had to see her when I got there. That’s when I knew that I wasn’t coming back.

Now, I know they make their livelihood out of people joining the gym. I would not be upset with her at all for being a little upset I wouldn’t sign up that night. But there is a huge difference between being a little upset and completely being rude in a controlling manner. I did not feel welcome as a visiting person.

Now, some people may feel like I’m just complaining and whining about something that was no big deal, but that is not my intent for I know there are many people who struggle with this. There are people who absolutely hate pushy people, and there are people who need to also work on their person skills. In this case, it is excellent to showcase all the benefits of the gym and be excited for another member. But if the visitor clearly has good reasons for wanting to check the gym out and get a feel for it first, then the manager should be more than welcoming. After all, they do advertise a free trial. The person should feel like they are definitely welcome to use the facility, to get a feel for it, and without the pressure of signing up right away, especially before even being allowed to try the gym for themselves. A position in customer service (any career where you deal with customers) is one in which good training needs to take place. I say this, because I deal with children, adults, teenagers, and every age in between every day. I converse with all personalities, teach all personalities, and have to maintain the healthiest relationships possible across the board. It takes some learning, but words, facial expressions, etc. need to be watched and guarded by self in order to build those great relationships. And this is no different in any other career.

So if you are in customer service, I pray that you will take care to be attentive to yourself and how you are reacting to others. Just because someone else is not doing what you want, doesn’t mean you have to be rude in exchange. Be the respectable person so that nobody will have anything legitimate to complain about. And if you are the type of person who gets turned off by pushy people, do your best to understand their motives, but also know it’s ok and you are not alone. Seek to find another person for there are definitely less pushy people out there.

Detective Teacher

Have you ever had to do anything crazy? Have you ever had a mystery as a teacher that you’ve had to figure out? Sometimes I wonder if I watch too many detective shows (CSI, Murdoch Mysteries, Bones, etc…). I’m always fascinated by the way detectives are able to figure things out. What is even more interesting is that Evidence and Investigation is also a unit in Grade 6 Science. So I’m able to share my fascination with my students.

While camping this week, I had a series of unfortunate events that caused me to practice some detective skills. And without sharing any specific names or details as to the people that were involved, here is the story:

Tuesday afternoon, we come back from afternoon field studies, and one of my students had lotion all over her sleeping bag. So I cleaned it off, and figured it was just a prank (doors to the cabins don’t lock the best).

Tuesday evening, when we returned from the evening activity, there was lotion on another student’s bed and blue handprints on our door. Then the 6 girls in my cabin started plotting ways to catch who it was. They were checking fingerprints, thinking of places to hide and catch them, etc… It was a JOB to get them to sleep that night.

Wednesday morning, I assumed nothing would happen during breakfast, but low and behold, there was toothpaste on a girl’s bed AND MY BED/PILLOW. I didn’t react though, because I had it dropped in my ear by that point that somebody thought one of my cabin girls was doing it, and I figured if it was, then reacting by anger would not get me the results I wanted. So I played it off like it was no big deal, and listened to the plans the girls told me I should do to figure it out (hiding on the top bunk, pretending to sleep during afternoon field studies, etc…).

We went to lunch, and of course came back to water on two of the girls’ beds. One soaking the sleeping bag, one just on the mattress. So I began thinking without telling the girls.

Once they left for afternoon field studies, I knew I had to hide somewhere that nobody had talked about, especially if it was one of my own girls. So I swept out the concrete floor the best I could (it’s so dirty), packed my large and small suitcase (it was packing day anyways so I figured it wouldn’t be suspicious), strategically placed them where I thought I would be most easily seen, and hid as close to the wall under the bed as I could. Throughout the hour and 15 minutes, my arm went numb, the floor was cold/dirty, but I knew I had to do what I could to catch whoever was doing this.

At one point, one of my girls ran in and was asking if I was in the room. So I whispered to her that I was under the bed (I knew it wasn’t this girl) and she told me she figured out that whoever did the blue handprints had to have gone to a certain field study that day because it’s the only place that had the blue chalk (the kids are divided up into study groups for the week and get through 2 stations a day). I told her thanks for figuring that out, and reminded her not to tell anyone where I was.

About 5 minutes after she left, the door opened again, and another one of the girls came in asking if anyone was there. She then jumped up on all of the bunk beds to check to see if I was hiding there (as they told me I should do). Thankfully, she didn’t think to check under the beds! I was basically holding my breath, I was so nervous she would see me. She then went over to her bag, took out one of her permanent markers, and wrote the word “STUPID” on her own mattress, and quickly ran out the door. I didn’t stop her in the act and instead waited to see what she did after she had left.

As I was getting out and saw what she had done, the girl that had originally come in to show me the chalk said that she had just seen the other girl leave, and wanted to know if anything happened. I quickly told her yes and showed it to her, and she came up with the brilliant idea of pretending that nobody had seen anything and going to tell her that something else had happened. And wouldn’t ya know, the girl who did it was like, “Something else happened? What happened?” And I just calmly smiled at her and told her she could go look if she wanted, and continued to walk over to where the other teacher from my school was to discuss how I should approach the whole situation.

I’m telling you, the things we, as teachers, have to do sometimes!

Do you have any interesting stories, any ways you’ve had to discover something going on in your classroom or on a trip? I would love to hear them! Leave your story in the comments below!

My New Experiment: Fruit

I think it’s time for a little background:

I grew up a hunter’s daughter. My father grew up a lumberjack’s son. He learned quickly in life that there was not a ton of money, and so my grandmother grew a vegetable garden, and whatever my grandfather was able to hunt was the meat they served (rabbits, deer, moose, partridge, etc…).

Thus, I grew up a heavy meat eater. In fact, stews or beans with biscuits, and the typical “meat and potatoes” were quite frequently a supper meal. Of course with the younger generations and slightly more money, pizzas and junk foods made their way in the diet as well. But it would not be uncommon for me as a child to sit down and eat a pound of bacon myself. That’s just the way it was.

I remember when I met my first vegetarians. They were like celebrities to me because the only people I ever knew of that would even think of not eating meat were celebrities. Nobody in the “real world” would ever think to live without eating meat. It must surely be a way to die!

However, seeing these people live, and healthily, gave me a spark that continued to grow. One morning, in my teenage years, I simply woke up, and told my mother never to make meat for me again.

Did I exactly know what I was getting into? Absolutely not. In fact, eating some vegetarian junk food without learning the proper way to eat healthily vegetarian landed me with intensive stomach pains and a visit to the hospital where the doctor informed me of some key staples I should be eating to be healthy. Oops. Learned that lesson the hard way.

And so it began. A somewhat healthier 10-11 years of being a vegetarian. Cold turkey. No going back.

It wasn’t until I met my husband, and found out he had grown up vegetarian that I went back to eating meat. Sounds weird, I know. But he met my family at my university graduation weekend, and my stepfather is notoriously known for his bbqing skills. My brother convinced him to try a “real” burger, and he was hooked. Of course, eventually it got to me, and I began eating meat again.

Of course, since I had been studying the Bible more and learning about healthier ways of eating, I still did not eat pork or animals considered “unclean”. I stuck with the basics of chicken, turkey, beef, and some fish. I am an Atlantic girl, and fish (specifically Atlantic Salmon) has always been a favourite.

Now recently, I’ve been reading and studying more into health. I’ve been looking at vegan diets, raw vegan diets, the details of what is going on with the meat that is served to us these days, the packaging, the handling, the processing, all of these things that are completely vital for us to know truly what we are putting in our bodies. And I’ve come to a conclusion: I need to get rid of the meat and animal products.

I could go on forever and ever about the toxins, poisons, and everything that is being put into animal products. I could tell you all about the fact that the majority of the meat we buy in stores has already gone bad and we don’t even know it. I could go on and on about how safety inspections are unrealistic, and how really, at the end of it all, we can only do the best we can with what we’re given. A hot topic, especially for someone who works out is of course how you get in enough protein.

But I’ve decided, the only true way to convince people is not a lecture, but to simply be a living example. And that is what I’m going to do.

Now, my husband is not quite on board with me on this, and I have promised to never ask him to change. If my life leads a perfect example, I figure that should be proof in and of itself. But little by little, he seems to be a little more supportive, though maintaining zero interest in it for himself, which is totally fine.

My plan is to still workout, to still continue researching how to eat properly, and to still continue on with everything else the same, except for how I eat. One difference. I’m getting the junk out of my system!

If you’re interested in this topic and wanting to know more yourself, the following are some of the links that I refer to frequently:

1. http://thebananagirl.com (she has other links from this site as well)

2. http://veganbodybuilding.com (some athletes even provide examples of their daily meals in their profiles)

3. http://www.thefrankmedrano.com (a man who chose to become vegan)

There are many more, but those are just a few to get started. I will keep you posted on how this goes!

#onajourneybacktoEden

A Job That Makes Me Feel Loved

There is nothing better than knowing you are missed. And as a teacher, it is one of the things that keeps us going.

I missed Thursday due to the Immigration interview (or the attempt thereof). Following Thursday was a regular 3-day weekend. So I usually expect that by the time Monday hits, my kids will not only claim to have forgotten some of the skills they have learned (but seem to quickly remember when shown again), they will also forget that I was not present that day. I was quite surprisingly wrong.

When I came back to school on Monday, one of my students who is not always the most vocal and definitely not the most emotional walked straight in the classroom, first student in, and said, “You were very much missed on Thursday.” Wow. What a warm welcome to start my day. I love these kids. I love my job. It’s the moments like these that make my job worth all the sacrifices I have to make.