Attempted and Failed – Healing Journey Day 59

Journal:
I felt fairly good waking up today, though I was tired. It was time to go back to work, though it would be a short and broken-up week.

Please excuse the language at the bottom of this book.

At first, I thought about starting Day 1 of the Summer Edition of 7 Days of Fruitrition  in the ebook, Go Fruit Yourself! by Freelee the Banana Girl. In preparation, I packed a watermelon which was the breakfast. However, I also packed bananas and spinach as I still owed one smoothie from that program. I didn’t even get to start eating the watermelon until lunch, and though it was an alright watermelon, I can definitely tell the difference between the quality now and the quality from the summer. It’s definitely not as good.

After finally finishing this small, 3.5 kg watermelon (the guide suggests an 8 kg one), I never got a chance to eat the rest of the work day and that was a mistake. I was not able to go home until after 9:00 pm meaning I had put in a 13+ hour day. Let’s just say… I did not complete Day 1. I ended up ordering food and though one item was a cooked, vegan pizza, the other was a big, raw salad. It does amaze me that even though I easily am falling back into bad, cooked food patterns, I have enhanced my desire for raw foods. I could not eat the cooked food without mentally knowing I had a big salad to go with it. That part of me has completely changed. I know that I need and my body screams for the raw foods.

As I said, I worked a long night preparing for my substitute tomorrow. I’m going to a Math PD with the other lower elementary teachers I work with, and it isn’t just a normal preparation, it also includes a Remembrance Day ceremony where we each create a wreath of poppies to present at the ceremony. That took up a bit of time to make.

Needless to say, I did not make it to the gym tonight. It was too late by the time I got home. So instead, I stayed up and worked some more (there never seems to be a shortage), and went to sleep.

Review of Symptoms:
-Acne is bad.
-Tired.
-Hair is feeling a little greasy after the water rinse today.
-Hip flexor is feeling a little better but not great.

Weight at the end of the day = 168.7 lbs (up 1.9 lbs from yesterday)

Total Calories = 2111 (68% carbs, 25% fat, 7% protein… too much fat…)

Week 9 Day 2

This morning was just not a good morning. I woke up unhappy, and just couldn’t seem to lift my own spirits today. My husband didn’t have to go to work until late, and so everything was rushed more than normal this morning. I missed being late by literally a hair, and I just felt such a mess this morning.

To continue matters, our worship today was filled with intense sadness. A brother to one of the teachers at a sister-school lost his wife due to some health complication that they weren’t able to save her from. To make matters more complicated, she was 6 months pregnant with their first child. They managed to save the child which of course is what his full attention is on as of now. He knows that his wife would have wanted him to do whatever necessary to keep their child alive, and so that is what he’s focussed so heavily on now. The baby is just over 2 lbs; very tiny and so very young. The problem is, he’s in the states, and as many of you know, this is not going to be an easy road financially with so many weeks to months of recovery for such a premature baby. I am going to ask that you please keep this man in your prayers. You may have no association to him, but these are people who thought little of themselves. In fact, they actually met while both volunteering for relief services after 9/11. The more I hear about this couple, the more unfair it seems. And the whole thing is that we will have no idea why God allows these things to happen to people that seem so good, the kind of people this world needs more of. But it is in my faith that God will wrap His arms around this man and his tiny son, and that He will help that son grow to a healthy state so that he can go home with his dad.

If you feel moved by this tragedy, I will leave the link to the donation site below. I’ve always been in Canada where we have not had to worry about such extreme health care costs. He needs your help. But most importantly, he needs your prayers.

Anyways, worship left me in a continued saddened state. The next stop was taking attendance and getting my students upstairs for our Remembrance Day ceremony. This assembly allowed me to take a breath, and to really contemplate things in my life, and realize again that I am so fortunate and blessed to have what I have. Even if my car needs work done, even if it’s extremely cold outside, even if my house is so trashed that I’d be embarrassed for anyone to see it, I still have things that other people do not. I need to be more grateful.

I’d love to say the rest of the day went much better, but no amount of reflection could have prepared me for the energy the kids brought today. They did so well containing it during the ceremony, but after finding out it was -25 Celsius outside, and so recess was inside, all of their energy was coming out in my room! Oh the madness! I was so glad when the day was done.

After school, I was not done work. In fact, I stayed at work until 8:00 p.m. I then came home, got ready, and went to the gym. I needed the gym tonight.

Tonight’s workout was supposed to be three circuits for back and biceps, but the gym was so packed! It ended up being supersets instead of full circuits just whenever I could find available machines or benches. I skipped cardio tonight because my mind was not in it. Instead, we came home and I continued to work on school related things until after 1:00 a.m. and even then, only went to bed because I knew I needed to. Definitely looking forward to an uplifted mood tomorrow!

If you’d like to donate to the tragedy described above, please click on the link below. I know he would very much appreciate any bit of help he can get to help his son fight for his life! Thank you in advance!

http://www.youcaring.com/memorial-fundraiser/ashley-picco-memorial-fund/260229