The Comfort of a Gray, Rainy Day

Yesterday morning, I jumped in my car like usual. I drove to the end of the driveway like usual, and turned down our street like usual. But something was slightly unusual about today, and that was the atmosphere around me.

I normally have the radio tuned into our local Christian station, but my husband had taken my car to the gym the night before without me. So instead, I turned on the ignition to the beginning of the song, “See You Again” by Wiz Khalifa. I normally don’t like his music, but with the impact this song had, especially at the end of the latest Fast and Furious. I really, really like this song. Mix that song, with gray skies, and light rain. Perfection. A certain mood attained. Just right for this moment.

When I was younger, my mother always drove when she was upset. In fact, we probably spent more time on the road than we ever did at home. Whether it was driving at the end of the school week to visit my grandparents, and then waiting until the morning of school to get up extra early and drive back in time to meet our bus, we were always on the road. It was a way of life.

My favourite was always being in the passenger seat while my mother was driving, when the skies were dark and there was a light rain with the radio on. To me, that speaks comfort. To me, that speaks perfection. To me, that speaks home. I may be a case of a kid who never really knew what home was. I may be a case of a person who has a distorted way of looking at things. But as an adult, I feel that in my confusion and unstable life, I have found the very things that can be stable, that can be comforting, no matter what season of life one may be in.

So call me crazy, or whatever you please. But I have security in the fact I have experienced so much in life. I’ve been through troubling places, I’ve lived and experienced so many different cultures and schools. I have been dragged through the fire multiple times, and yet I can tell you exactly how not to fall apart when others may possibly see no way out.

I’m not a person who has despised my childhood, but rather a person who is thankful for learning what is most important to survive whatever may come in an adult life. You can plan your life, you can plan your job, your spouse, your schooling, etc… But plans rarely work out the way they are supposed to. The one thing you can prepare is your reactions, your attitude, and your stability. If you have that, with God by your side, it won’t matter whether money is an obstacle or struggle. Because you’ve already learned how to deal with change before.

It pays to be happy with the little things in life, because it’s the little things that will keep you going. So learn now what makes you happy, learn now how to react to change. Find comfort in the things that are stable to you, even if it’s driving in a car on a gray, rainy day.

Day 13

This morning was a bit of a better morning, at least as far as food choices. I don’t even want to get into my lack of sleep.

I woke up and had water first thing (I’m getting better at water at least!). I then waited 20-30 minutes, and had a banana, 4 medjool dates, and some veggies chips. A bit later, I had some organic limeade and my vitamins.

We had to leave the house to get my husband another dress shirt for work. So naturally, we got hungry while we were out, and ate. I had a veggie burrito and tater tots (not the best, but one of the better alternatives). We kept shopping a little more, then grabbed stuff for the way home. My husband got a Pineapple Whey smoothie, and I got a fresh juice made form kale, apples, carrots, and pineapple. The girl went heavy on the kale, but that is a good thing. I could use the extra greens.

Both my husband and I have felt awfully tired today. So we took a bit of a nap before we had to make arrangements to meet with my dad. On the way to meet with him, we did a quick gas station stop. I don’t know what was wrong with me, but my stomach feels bloated and full! Almost like my digestion is at a stall. At the gas station, I picked up a candy bar (sometimes the excess sugar helps my digestion keep going), and an aloe drink. The bar actually did help soothe my stomach a little. I’m not really sure how this works. And the aloe was soothing and hydrating of course.

I didn’t eat much else today, but before bed, I had 3 pieces of Silver Hills Squirrely bread. Two with an avocado, cucumber, lemon juice and a dash of salt and pepper, the third piece with peach jam made with xylitol. I am thinking this was a little too heavy to eat before bed.

Gas Station Foods… Be Careful!

So tonight, I needed a quick pick-me-up before my workout and I was on a quick time budget as the gym was closing early for Labour Day. So I did the dreaded stop at a gas station. 

I got a Rockstar Light Vanilla Latte. I’m not one to promote energy drinks, nor to consume them often. But I have found that this one seems to have less of a fleeting heart feeling, while tasting good and not killing the macros. Again, this is definitely not something I do all the time. I don’t believe energy drinks are healthy.

Also, I just took a quick walk around the store. And what I found was awful.

Of course, gas stations offer some healthier options such as beef jerky (watch for preservatives), some veggies/fruits and protein bars. Sometimes they also have hard-boiled eggs. But most of the food is absolute junk.

I picked up a raisin butter tart out of curiosity. Did you know that ONE tart was 490 calories? More than a quarter of my daily caloric intake? I was in total shock. There is no way that one tart could fill in a meal for me. Totally not worth it. Not to mention, most of that tart is guaranteed to be sugar and butter. Incredible.

What do you do in a pinch? Every once in awhile, we will always find ourselves in that gas station scenario. So what do you look for? I’m curious to know!