Week 7 Day 4

You would think that I’d be more rested today, but that wasn’t the case. I’m so tired and worn out. I’m not getting the rest and the sleep that I need. My body is not recovering.

Somehow I made it out of bed and got to work barely on time. It was another odd day as we had another presenter come for our grades 5-8 assembly. He spoke about his career in acting, his involvement in the music industry, and the things he’d learned about the devil’s involvement and God’s leading. It was an incredible, immaculate presentation which of course left the students with a million questions, and yet again, we had another day where I feel like very little curriculum was actually taught. But when it comes to important questions, I am always game.

This afternoon was bad though. I hit a low. I was tired. I just wanted to put my head down on my desk and sleep. Thankfully, today was my recess duties and the air outside helped me to wake up some.

Today’s workout was mainly three circuits based on back and biceps with a few extra thrown in there. But I noticed that I really struggled with one particular exercise tonight: Box Jumps.

I’m not a jumper. Never have been. I was on the starting line-up the one year I played basketball because I was tall, not because I would jump. They would make me spend so much time jumping against the brick wall, trying to get me to jump higher and higher. But I’m not a jumper. There is no spring in my jump. That being said, I was scared of box jumps for the longest time. I envisioned falling and crashing my knees into the box. And so when our coach started using box jumps, I was hesitant. Instead of going directly to a “box”, I began with the step-up steps so that I could start very small and add levels as I went.

My first set tonight had 4 levels up and I was fine. My second set had 5 levels up and I was fine. But when I got to that 6th level, I freaked. Normally, to beat my mind, I stand on the top and jump down first so that my body realizes the distance between the top and the floor. But even though I could do this many times in a row, my body at some points refused to complete the jump. I found myself several times with my right foot on the top of the jump, and my left foot landing on the floor. My own brain was ceasing my body’s progress!

I can’t deny it was a struggle. It wasn’t that I was incapable, but simply that my brain was telling me that I couldn’t. But I knew better. It may have taken me twice to three times as long as any other set, but I got it done. I beat my brain. I was capable and I showed myself that.

My bed was very welcoming tonight and after both the mental and physical battles in the gym, I was ever so ready to go to sleep.

Week 2 Day 6

Oh how nice it feels to sleep in… those were my thoughts today! Of course, when I did wake up, I realized that I needed to get my butt in gear and get ready for my appointments. I had a massage, a chiropractor, and an acupuncture appointment back to back. I’m telling you, it was like being pampered in a spa!

As I was leaving, the fact that I had not eaten anything yet was starting to bother me. A few times, earlier in the summer, I would stop at the convenient drive-thru A&W on the way home. This thought crossed my mind again. But I began to mentally challenge myself. Do I really want something so greasy? Do I really want to waste my macros? Or possibly have a chance of going over? Is my body really being rewarded by eating that burger?

Then it hit me: It wasn’t the really the taste I was craving, it wasn’t really a love for the food, it was convenience, it was habit. How awful is that! Sure it would have been so easy to turn in, grab a burger, and satisfy my hunger sooner than later, but that’s not really what I wanted. I want to look good, to feel good, and to be in control of my body and the nutrition I feed it. So I kept on driving.

The rest of the day went well, until supper. My husband had to drive around to various tool shops looking for the right tools he needed for work. We had already driven around our side of the city, and decided we might as well drive to the other side of the city and get all the tool shopping done. So we planned on eating out (macros allowed for it).

Our favourite East Indian restaurant was on that side of the city. This restaurant has a buffet so it is very easy to control what gets put on your plate. But something happened that has never happened here before.

When we get buffet, the hostess always expects you to get up and start serving yourself. Then they always bring you a jug of water for your table. Well, this time, there was no jug of water when we got back. In fact, despite my trying to catch a waitresses attention (they were very busy), we probably didn’t have water for at least 15-20 minutes. When the waitress came over and realized, she gave me a look of horror and apologized so sincerely. I kept telling her it was ok, and she had a fresh jug of water rushed over to us. But that wasn’t the end. She also came over with a plate of 3 desserts. Oh boy…

The lady told us that as an apology she had picked out her top three favourite desserts from their storefront bakery and that she hoped we liked them. I felt so horrible. I could not eat them and run the risk of hurting her feelings, or I could eat them and let her know I liked them and that everything was good. Main point of the story, I didn’t want to hurt her feelings, and I felt really bad that she felt so bad, I tried to eat them. Half way through, she brought us a fresh, straight out of the kitchen dessert. Now don’t get me wrong, they were delicious, but FOUR DESSERTS! My husband took a couple bites to help me, and I tried to get them all down, but needless to say, I was STUFFED and managed only a bite or two out of the last one. This was the worst thing I could have done.

See, upon reflection, I could have politely ate one and then asked for a box for the rest. I could have figured out other ways of not hurting her feelings instead of just going to the worst alternative. Because afterwards, I felt SO SICK.

I did make it to the gym that night, but managed to only complete half of my workout which was a circuit of four exercises. I felt so awful. Not to mention I haven’t had processed sugar in quite some time, since starting this challenge. All I wanted to do was sleep so that I didn’t have to be awake and feel the way I did. It really was that awful.

What can I say to sum up this day? Lesson learned!