Today was probably one of the most stressful days of my life! Today I had my provincial evaluation for being a teacher. This is the day that could either make me or break me; I could remain a teacher for all-time, or my career could have been ended quite soon.
In preparation for this evaluation, I had a lot of sorting, reflecting, writing, and overall preparing to do. I did not sleep last night. In fact, I stayed up until 4:00 a.m. (way too much caffeine) just working on paperwork and lesson preparation. Then I got ready, and was at the school by 5:20 a.m. to make sure everything would be as ready as possible for when my evaluator showed up at 7:45 a.m. My husband would tell you, I was so tired, so full of caffeine (which I NEVER do like this), and so stressed, I was shaking immensely.
Two teachers in my school had been through this process in the past 2 years (one just a couple weeks ago). They both had the easiest times with their evaluators and passed with flying colours. My evaluator? Let’s just say, my secretary meets a lot of people, and even she could tell this guy was not that easy. *Sigh… God does not call the equipped, he equips the called.
So anyways, my evaluator was supposed to stay for the day, but had decided to leave after lunch, after he had talked with the principal and talked with me. He had a few positive things to say, mainly telling me that I’ll do fine, but I’m the type of person that needs to hear that I’m doing good, not that I WILL do fine. That made me nervous.
Of course, by the time evening had come around, my principal sent me a little message saying that he was impressed by what he had seen in my room. Well, that made it a whole lot better! I needed to hear that.
Now, although I technically “passed”, my evaluation is sadly not over as he will not process my recommendation until I’ve had a “current” evaluation from the principal, which he’s requested to be completed in the next two weeks. Only then will he come back, take a copy of her evaluation as well, and then I can finally sign the papers. Close, but not quite 100% there yet.
What really amazed me today was my students. Especially my student that probably demands the most of my attention on a regular basis. The amount that he kept telling the evaluator how he couldn’t fail me not only shocked me, but also spoke to me. For the first time in my life, I heard the student, who probably gets in the most trouble, whom I have the most “talks” with, said the most amazing things. The conversation was as follows:
Student: You can’t fail her.
Evaluator: Why not?
Student: She’s a limited edition teacher.
Evaluator: Well isn’t every teacher a limited edition teacher?
Student: She has a feature.
Evaluator: Well what is that feature?
Student: She can deal with a _______. (his name was placed there)
Now needless to say, more talking occurred from this point. But to think that the one student I constantly am working with the most feels that way about me, I was almost ready to cry. The amount of love I felt from those very words coming out of his mouth astonished me. All those days of frustration, of finding time I didn’t have to try and work out something, anything with this kid to get him to work in class and to stop bothering others, came out in the right moment, the moment that I’m sure helped me to shine a little brighter.
Of course, other students in my class also told him what a great teacher I was when they were asked, but even a few of previous girls from last year continued to stop in periodically and remind me to smile and to continue to do the best I could, the exact same things I had been telling them for the past two years.
As I was welcoming my students in my classroom in the morning, the grade 5 teacher quickly pulled me aside and without even asking put his hand on me and lifted me up in prayer.
The support is incredible. Sometimes the support is overwhelming, and always in the right moments. I love the school I work at, I love the people I work with, and most of all, I love the students who in the end appreciate all the hard work I’ve put into them, even if it does come years later.
Now I’m off to bed. Finally get to have some sleep!
Calm in Christ and Fitness 